olved to depart before day.
What should I do here? It would be easy to go, for no one had
recognized me.

"But I did not depart.

"Persons came to me from all quarters, and offered me their hands--to
be filled. But, doctor, I once to kill time fed the sparrows on my
window-sill, and from that day the importunate beggars are possessed to
come here every morning, and distract me with their noise; there is no
frightening them away. It is easy to acquire habits, but hard to break
them up. I stopped asking about anybody, for I heard of nothing but
death and disaster, and a hundred times a day got a stab at my heart.
Whoever came in my way was very well; who did not, was gone. All came
to see me except my sister-in-law and her prince. 'My brother-in-law
knows where his parents' house is,' she said. 'It is not for us to run
after him.' The very first time I saw young Lenz, I conceived a dislike
to him. He looked like none of us, but took after his mother's family.
When I look round upon the village now, and the whole district, in
fact, I am ready to tear my old hair out for having come home.
Everything is stunted and lazy and spoiled. Where is the old
light-heartedness, the old high spirit? Gone. The youths are good for
nothing. Don't I have to pick the cherries before they are ripe to
prevent the young trees from being broken? My musical nephew there
cossets himself up in his room, while I, at his age, was out making my
way in the world. I mind nothing; but he turns pale and sick at every
rough wind and every rough word. There was a time when I hoped
something from him, and thought he might still make my life happy. If
he had married your daughter Amanda, the young people should have come
to me, or I would have gone to them. My property would have come into
your family, as it is right it should; for I am indebted to your father
for the beginning of my good fortune, if good fortune it is. That
cursed Pilgrim guessed my thoughts, and tried to make me a go-between.
I would have nothing to do with it. I never give advice nor take it.
Every man must work out his life in his own way. And this is the point
I want to come at: that I won't give a red cent; rather would I throw
my money into the fire. Now I have talked enough. I have made myself
quite hot."

"How did the water of the spring by the church taste, that you had
longed for so much?" asked the doctor.

"Bad; very bad. It is too cold and too hard. I cannot bear it."

W