the principal daily papers
about the expense of this so-called game, and calculations as to
whether it can be played for less than twenty-five shillings a time,
I am merely amused. In my opinion, if the relatives of members of
golf-clubs cannot afford to support them, these institutions should
either be closed or the inmates should be provided with some better
game, like basketball. That is what I feel about golf.

All the same, if Enderby really thinks and believes that, because in
a nasty cross-wind I happened to be slicing badly and didn't know
the course and lost a ball at the twelfth, and he holed twice out of
bunkers and certainly baulked me by sniffing on the fifteenth tee,
and laid a stymie, mark you, of all places at the seventeenth, that
I can't beat him three times out of five in normal conditions and not
with that appalling caddy ---- well, I suppose one must do one's best
to relieve a fellow-creature of his hallucinations, mustn't one?

EVOE.

* * * * *

[Illustration: THE BOBLET.

BRITANNIA (_counting her change_). "WHAT'S THIS?"

OUR MR. CHAMBERLAIN. "THAT, MADAM, IS THE NEW SHILLING. IT HAS MORE
ALLOY THAN THE OLD, BUT THE SAME PURCHASING POWER."

BRITANNIA. "PURCHASING WEAKNESS, YOU MEAN."]

* * * * *

[Illustration: _Host_ (_by way of keeping his guest's mind off the
state of the course_). "ASTONISHING HOW QUICKLY PEOPLE HAVE FORGOTTEN
THE WAR."

_Guest_. "WHAT--WITH THIS MUD, AND YOU AT THE SLOPE?"]

* * * * *

OUR HEAVY-WAITS.

Our Boxing Correspondent sends us the following gloomy forecast.
We have pointed out to him that Mr. COCHRAN has recently made a
definite contract for a meeting between DEMPSEY and CARPENTIER. Our
Correspondent replies that this does not affect his attitude, and
urges us to publish his predictions of further delay. We do so under
protest.

_Paris, December 22nd, 1920._--M. DESCHAMPS (CARPENTIER'S Manager)
denies all knowledge of any agreement with Mr. COCHRAN.

_New York, December 24th, 1920._--Mr. C. B. COCHRAN says that
DESCHAMPS must be dotty. He (C. B.) is returning by the _Mauretania_
to-morrow.

_London, April 17th, 1923._--As Mr. COCHRAN and M. DESCHAMPS have
not yet come to an agreement the fight for the World's Heavy-Weight
Championship is indefinitely postponed. JOE BECKETT meets Bombardier
WELLS to-night at the Circle.

_London, April 18th, 1923._--Si