rmadillo at a travelling menagerie.
The efficacy of our blockade was such that large consignments of
armadillo-fodder were prevented from reaching Germany, the consequent
demise of all German-kept armadilloes thus robbing our enemy of the
opportunity of devising a similar instrument.

58. ... will parade in full marching order at Reveille.

58A. _Facts, Historical_.--There once was a king who never smiled
again, but history might have recorded a different verdict had His
Majesty witnessed the spectacle of the Second-in-Command, on a frisky
horse, trying to drill the Battalion.

59. ... will therefore immediately submit rolls of all skilled
organ-blowers of Category B ii.

59A. _Information, General_.--If all the Treasury Notes circulated in
the United Kingdom since 1914 were placed end to end they might reach
from Bristol to Yokohama and back, but they would not constitute a
sufficient inducement to a London taxi-driver.

60. ... and this practice must cease forthwith.

60A. _Query, Our Daily_.--What is Popocatapetl? Is it an indoor game,
a cannibal tribe, a curative herb, or neither? Solutions are invited.

There are two very advantageous points about this scheme: (1) The
ingenious system of numbering would avoid interference with army
routine, which must go on: and (2) men might be encouraged to read
Regimental Orders.

This suggestion is made without hope of fee or reward. Its author does
not even ask for extra duty pay.

* * * * *

[Illustration: HIS STOCK-IN-TRADE.

_Tramp_. "CAN YOU SPARE A PORE OLD GENTLEMAN THE PRICE OF A CUP OF
KORFEE. SIR?"

_Sub._ (_in high spirits_). "RIGHT-O. ALL THE COFFEE YOU WANT AND THE
PRICE OF A SHAVE AND A HAIR-CUT AS WELL."

_Tramp_. "WILL YER? THEN WHO'S A-GOIN' TO KEEP ME WHILE MY 'AIR AN'
BEARD GROWS AGAIN?".]

* * * * *

A FINE EAR FOR THE HASPIRATE.

"I wish 'as 'ow I warn't married."

Mr. Punt crooned out the impious aspiration as he sorted a judicious
modicum of hemp into the canary seed. He spoke in semi-soliloquy,
yet quite loud enough to reach the vigilant ear of Mrs. Punt, who was
dusting the cages at the other end of the live-stock store. She said
nothing in reply, but her eye fixed itself upon him with a glint
eloquent of what she might say later.

"Why is that, Mr. Punt?" I asked encouragingly.

"Why, it's on'y to-day, Sir, as I met a lidy, a widder lidy, friend o'
Uncle George's do