charms, and are, in the end,
revolting even to him who exacts them. Society puts all women on the
same level; the handsome and the ugly, after their defeat are
indistinguishable except from their art to maintain their authority;
but what commonly happens? A woman imagines she has nothing more to do
than to be affectionate, caressing, sweet, of even temper, and
faithful. She is right in one sense, for these qualities should be the
foundation of her character; they will not fail to draw esteem; but
these qualities, however estimable they may be, if they are not offset
by a shade of contrariety, will not fail to extinguish love, and bring
on languor and weariness, mortal poisons for the best constituted
heart.
Do you know why lovers become nauseated so easily when enjoying
prosperity? Why they are so little pleased after having had so much
pleasure? It is because both parties interested have an identically
erroneous opinion. One imagines there is nothing more to obtain, the
other fancies she has nothing more to give. It follows as a necessary
consequence that one slackens in his pursuit, and the other neglects
to be worthy of further advances, or thinks she becomes so by the
practice of solid qualities. Reason is substituted for love, and
hence-forward no more spicy seasoning in their relations, no more of
those trifling quarrels so necessary to prevent dissatisfaction by
forestalling it.
But when I exact that evenness of temper should be animated by
occasional storms, do not be under the impression that I pretend
lovers should always be quarreling to preserve their happiness. I only
desire to impress it upon you, that all their misunderstandings should
emanate from love itself; that the woman should not forget (by a
species of pusillanimous kindness) the respect and attentions due her;
that by an excessive sensitiveness she does not convert her love into
a source of anxiety capable of poisoning every moment of her
existence; that by a scrupulous fidelity she may not render her lover
too sure that he has nothing to fear on that score.
Neither should a woman by a sweetness, an unalterable evenness of
temper, be weak enough to pardon everything lacking in her lover.
Experience demonstrates that women too often sacrifice the hearts of
their spouses or their lovers, by too many indulgences and facilities.
What recklessness! They martyrize themselves by sacrificing
everything; they spoil them and convert them into ungra
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