peak, in case they be made to work like ither
folk, instead of leading a life of idleness.

But to the point: I ance had a monkey, ane of the drollest-looking
deevils ye ever saw. He was gayan big for a monkey, and was hairy
a' ower, except his face and his bit hurdies, which had a degree of
bareness about them, and were nearly as saft as a lady's loof. Weel,
what think ye that I did wi' the beastie? Odds, man, I dressed him up
like a Heelandman, and put a kilt upon him, and a lang-tailed red
coat, and a blue bannet, which for security's sake I tied, woman-like,
below his chin wi' twa bits of yellow ribbon. I not only did this, but
I learnt him to walk upon his twa hinder legs, and to carry a stick
in his right hand when he gaed out, the better to support him in his
peregrinations. He was for a' the world like a wee man in kilts.

Weel, it turned out in this manner, as ye shall hear. Ae afternoon
towards the glomin' I was oblegated to tak' a stap doun to the cross,
wi' a web under my arm, which I had finished for Mr. Weft, the muslin
manufacturer. By way of frolic, a gayan foolish ane I allow, I brocht
Nosey (the monkey's name,) alang wi' me. He had on, as for ordinar',
his Heeland dress, and walkit behint me, wi' the bit stick in his
hand, and his tail sticking out frae below his kilt, as if he had been
my flunky. It was, after a', a queer sicht, and, as may be supposed, I
drew a haill crowd of bairns after me, bawling out, "Here's Willy
M'Gee's monkey," and gi'eing him nits and gingerbread, and makin' as
muckle of the cratur as could be; for Nosey was a great favourite in
the town, and everbody likit him for his droll tricks, and the way he
used to girn, and dance, and tumble ower his head, to amuse them.

On entering Mr. Weft's shop, I faund it empty; there wasna a leeving
soul within. I supposed he had gane out for a licht; and being gayan
familiar wi' him, I took a stap ben to the back shop, leaving Nosey in
the fore ane. I sat for twa or three minutes, but naebody made his
appearance. At last the front door, which I had ta'en care to shut
after me, opened, and I look't to see wha it could be, thinking that,
nae doubt, it was Mr. Weft, or his apprentice. It was neither the ane
nor the ither, but a strong middle-aged, red-faced Heelandman, wi'
specks on, and wi' a kilt and a bannet, by a' the world like my
monkey's. Now, what think ye Nosey was about a' this time? He was
sittin' behind the counter upon the lang th