that is why I hope so
very much that he will read this very unlikely story.

* * * * *

MORE PAY FOR M.P.'S.

(_A perfectly horrible prospect._)

If I were a Member of Parliament[A]
On a most inadequate stipend,
Up in an attic and worn and spent
And wondering how to pay my rent,
And sucking an old clay pipe end,

I'd write to BONAR and Mr. GEORGE,
Or the party Whips that ran 'em,
"Unless you want me to steal or forge
You must make those Treasury blokes disgorge
A thousand at least per annum.

"Put it at that and make it free
From AUSTEN CHAMBERLAIN'S taxes,
For the glory withers that used to be
The sole reward of a stout M.P.
As the cost of everything waxes.

"What-not and Coalitionist
Equally crave the shilling
For a pot of beer or an ounce of twist
As they trudge to their homes through the mire and mist
From the long day's lobby-filling.

"Radical joins Conservative
In a concord wholly hearty,
Wanting to know if the State will give
An adequate wage upon which to live,
And so does the National Party.

"And the boots of the Labour Members creak
And a terrible ghastly pallor is
On the Wee Free face as it tries to speak;
But ah! what a change to each sunken cheek
If you put a bit more on our salaries!

"Shibboleths old to the wind we'd fling
And turn to the task that presses;
Sound reforms would go with a swing
And we might have a chance of lengthening
Those fearfully short recesses.

"There'd be the chance to show your tact
In welding the hostile sections;
Sworn and sealed in a mighty pact
We'd put on the books the world's best Act
Abolishing all elections."

EVOE.

[Footnote A: This beautiful opening line is not original. It is
borrowed, with due acknowledgments, from a once famous music-hall
song.]

* * * * *

From an article on "History without Tears":--

"There is no book that gives one a more comprehensive idea of the
character of the Byzantine Empire, of the reasons for its decline
and its disappearance, than Scott's 'Count Robert of Sicily.'"

Except perhaps Wrongfellow's "King Robert of Paris."

* * * * *
[Illustration: _Sportsman (who has mounted boy for his first hunt in
Ireland_). "WELL, HOW DID YOU GET ON?"

_Boy._ "FIRST-RATE, THANK YOU. I'LL GO IN A HAR