ost intolerable of all is,
that though they contribute nothing towards the good and welfare of
the community, though they are

"Unknown alike in council and in field;" {189}

yet are they perpetually finding fault with, abusing, and reviling
others, and he is counted the greatest amongst them who is most
impudent, noisy, and malevolent; if one should say to one of these
fellows who speak ill of everybody, 'What service are you of to the
commonwealth?' he would reply, if he spoke fairly and honestly, 'To
be a sailor or a soldier, or a husbandman, or a mechanic, I think
beneath me; but I can make a noise and look dirty, wash myself in
cold water, go barefoot all winter, and then, like Momus, find fault
with everybody else; if any rich man sups luxuriously, I rail at,
and abuse him; but if any of my friends or acquaintance fall sick,
and want my assistance, I take no notice of them.'

"Such, my brother gods, are the cattle {190} which I complain of;
and of all these the Epicureans are the worst, who assert that the
gods take no care of human affairs, or look at all into them: it is
high time, my brethren, that we should take this matter into
consideration, for if once they can persuade the people to believe
these things, you must all starve; for who will sacrifice to you,
when they can get nothing by it? What the Moon accuses you of, you
all heard yesterday from the stranger; consult, therefore, amongst
yourselves, and determine what may best promote the happiness of
mankind, and our own security." When Jupiter had thus spoken, the
assembly rung with repeated cries, of "thunder, and lightning! burn,
consume, destroy! down with them into the pit, to Tartarus, and the
giants!" Jove, however, once more commanding silence, cried out,
"It shall be done as you desire; they and their philosophy shall
perish together: but at present, no punishments must be inflicted;
for these four months to come, as you all know, it is a solemn
feast, and I have declared a truce: next year, in the beginning of
the spring, my lightning shall destroy them.

"As to Menippus, first cutting off his wings that he may not come
here again, let Mercury carry him down to the earth."

Saying this, he broke up the assembly, and Mercury taking me up by
my right ear, brought me down, and left me yesterday evening in the
Ceramicus. And now, my friend, you have heard everything I had to
tell you from heaven; I must take my leave, and carry this