o about singing, "Oh, call the Fog-Fiend
back to us!" with refrain, "Oh, when the Fogs were here with us, Would
we had used them more!"

1909.--Last surviving Chimney-sweeper, provided with a well-ventilated
chamber at Madame Tussaud's. Special charge of sixpence for adults,
threepence for children, made for privilege of seeing him.

1910.--Rest of inhabitants of England, as well as foreign invalids,
flock to London because of noted purity and salubrity of its climate.
Riviera deserted. London a little over-crowded, but very clean.

* * * * *

THREE ACRES AND AN EGG.

The following pleasing announcement appears in the advertisement
columns of the _East of Fife Record_.--

WANTED, COTTAGERS and others to HATCH EGGS. Liberal Terms.
Apply, &c.

We are glad to see the men of Fife thus taking the lead in creating
new openings for the agricultural labourer. Of course the weather will
have much influence upon the success of the new avocation. To sit out
hatching eggs in one of such blizzards as we have had since Christmas
would be exceedingly inconvenient, upon whatever "Liberal terms."
But, given a fair summer day or a quiet autumn evening, there seems
something quite idyllic in the picture of the agricultural labourer
sitting out in his own Three Acres hatching eggs,--probably laid by
the Cow.

* * * * *

[Illustration: OLD FRIENDS.

"DO YOU EVER SEE BOBBIE BOUNCER NOW?"

"OH DEAR NO! HE'S _FAR_ TOO GREAT A SWELL! IF ONE PITCHES INTO
ANYTHING HE DOES, HE CUTS UP ROUGH, IF YOU PLEASE, AND GIVES ONE THE
COLD SHOULDER! THOSE VERY SUCCESSFUL FELLOWS ALWAYS DO!"

"AND BILL JAKES?"

"POOR OLD STICK-IN-THE-MUD! HAD TO DROP HIM! DOOCID SIGHT TOO FOND OF
TELLING ONE THE PLAIN TRUTH ABOUT ONESELF, WHEN ONE'S NOT INCLINED FOR
IT, YOU KNOW! ALWAYS THE WAY WITH THOSE FELLOWS WHO DON'T GET ON!"]

* * * * *

THE FRIEND OF LABOUR.

How doth the provident M.P.
Improve each shining hour,
And in the "Labour Question" see
Hopes of return to power!

How skilfully he shapes his "sell,"
How neatly spreads his "fakes"!
On Labour's ear they sound right well,
The promises he makes.

Skilled Labour, Labour without skill,
He would have busy, too;
Nay, he would find some Labour still
For idle "hands" to do.

Yet, Labour, whatsoe'er he say,
To trust him be not fast;
Or you'll di