to the Lord for all his benefits? Shall I not,
from this time, cry unto Him, "My Father, thou
art the guide of my youth"? But, for the year that
is passed, what can I say? I will lay my hand on
my mouth and acknowledge that it has been squandered.
Yes, so far as it has not been employed about
my Father's business. But, alas! it has been
crammed with selfishness; though now and then
He, whom I trust I yet desire to serve, has made me
sensibly feel how precious is every small dedication
to Himself.
_6th Mo. 16th_. The consideration of the peculiar
doctrines of Friends having been lately rather
forced on my attention, let me record my increased
conviction of the privilege of an education within
the borders of the Society; of the great value and
importance of its spiritual profession, and the awful
responsibility of its members to walk so as to adorn
its doctrines, and shine as lights in the world.
Warmly as she was attached to these principles, she ever rejoiced in
the conviction that all the followers of Christ are one in Him, and
that, by whatever name designated, those who have attained to the
closest communion with Him are the nearest to one another; and when
differences in sentiment were the topic of conversation, she would
sometimes rejoin in an earnest tone, the "commandment is exceeding
broad."
_2d Mo. 2d_, 1840. Time passes on, and what progress
do I make, either in usefulness in the earth,
or preparation for heaven? Self-indulgence is the
bane of godliness, and is, alas! mine.' This world's
goods are snares, and are, alas! snares to me.
Coward that my heart is, when pride is piqued, I
have not resolution to conquer my own spirit.
Pride, indolence, and worldly-mindedness are bringing
me into closer and closer bondage: the first
keeps me from true worship by preventing me from
seeking the help and teaching of the one Spirit;
the second, by making me yield without effort or
resistance to the uncontrolled imaginations which
the third presents. And now do these lines witness
that, having been called to an everlasting salvation,
God, the chief good, having manifested His name
unto the least of His little ones, my soul and body
are for Him, _belong_ to Him, to be moulded and
fashioned according to His will; and that if I
frustrate His purpose, His glorious holiness and
free grace are unsullied and everlastingly worthy.
_7th
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