looks, he
helps the show out of lots of bad holes. Pa lit a cigar and put it in
one side of his mouth, put his hat up on one side of his head, like he
was tough, and looked wise, and said:

"Fellow fakirs, I have been watching the animals all day, and while I do
not say they understand enough of the ways of human beings to be posted
on labor unions, and all that, I want to tell you they are on a strike,
and that grizzly and that lion are the walking delegates that are
stirring them up to mischief. They may not know anything about the
teamsters' strike, but they know something has happened, and they are
displeased at something, and they have lost respect for the employer.
They are on a strike, and the very devil is going to pay to-morrow,
unless the cause of the dissatisfaction is discovered, mutual
concessions made, and arbitration resorted to.

"Gentlemen, you hear me," said pa, and he sat down on the edge of the
arm of the car seat.

They gave pa the laugh, but finally told him to take charge of the
strike and settle it quick, but they wanted to know what he thought
animals would be dissatisfied about, as long as they got food enough to
eat.

Pa said: "I'll tell you. You feed the horses and other hay-eating
animals on musty baled hay, bought from contractors that may have had it
on hand for five years. How would you like it if you were served with
breakfast food that had been stored in a warehouse until it was
mildewed? A horse or an elephant has feelings. Give them baled hay, and
when they are trying to pick out a mouthful that is not spoiled, you
drive along with a load of nice new-mown timothy or alfalfa, and see
them make a rush for that load of hay, the way my ten-horse team did the
other day for that load of cornstalks. Then the sacred cattle are hot
under the collar because of the fellows who use profanity. Can you
imagine a sacred cow trying to be good, and set a pious example to the
heathen animals, being patient when they have to listen to swearing? You
buy meat that is tainted for the lions, who like fresh meat, and the
jackal, that only loves bad meat, gets the only sirloin in the lot. Let
me run the menagerie to-morrow, and I will have Mr. Lion, the walking
delegate, declare this strike off."

Well, they told pa to arbitrate the strike, and the next day he had a
couple of loads of timothy hay, such as mother used to make, driven in
and unloaded, and the horses, elephants, camels, and things almost s