. Ah, I used to be a lot of things. I used to have two or
three decent suits of clothes, and flannels to go up the river on
Sundays. Look at me now: this is my best; and it must last till
Christmas. What can I do? Ive never opened a book since I was qualified
thirty years ago. I used to read the medical papers at first; but you
know how soon a man drops that; besides, I cant afford them; and
what are they after all but trade papers, full of advertisements? Ive
forgotten all my science: whats the use of my pretending I havnt? But
I have great experience: clinical experience; and bedside experience is
the main thing, isn't it?

B. B. No doubt; always provided, mind you, that you have a sound
scientific theory to correlate your observations at the bedside. Mere
experience by itself is nothing. If I take my dog to the bedside with
me, he sees what I see. But he learns nothing from it. Why? Because he's
not a scientific dog.

WALPOLE. It amuses me to hear you physicians and general practitioners
talking about clinical experience. What do you see at the bedside but
the outside of the patient? Well: it isnt his outside thats wrong,
except perhaps in skin cases. What you want is a daily familiarity with
people's insides; and that you can only get at the operating table. I
know what I'm talking about: Ive been a surgeon and a consultant for
twenty years; and Ive never known a general practitioner right in his
diagnosis yet. Bring them a perfectly simple case; and they diagnose
cancer, and arthritis, and appendicitis, and every other itis, when
any really experienced surgeon can see that it's a plain case of
blood-poisoning.

BLENKINSOP. Ah, it's easy for you gentlemen to talk; but what would you
say if you had my practice? Except for the workmen's clubs, my patients
are all clerks and shopmen. They darent be ill: they cant afford it. And
when they break down, what can I do for them? You can send your people
to St Moritz or to Egypt, or recommend horse exercise or motoring or
champagne jelly or complete change and rest for six months. I might as
well order my people a slice of the moon. And the worst of it is, I'm
too poor to keep well myself on the cooking I have to put up with.
Ive such a wretched digestion; and I look it. How am I to inspire
confidence? [He sits disconsolately on the couch].

RIDGEON [restlessly] Dont, Blenkinsop: its too painful. The most tragic
thing in the world is a sick doctor.

WALPOLE. Yes, by Geo