arpeners) continue earnestly to "claim" this province and
that, up to the very last moment of uncertainty, and the common people
murder one another in the streets for the crime of doubting that the man
is chosen whom the assassin was pleased to prefer. When the majority of a
province has chosen one candidate and a majority of the nation another,
the mental situation of the worthy Tamtonian is not over-easy of
conception, but there can be no doubt that his faith in the wisdom of
majorities remains unshaken.

One of the two antagonistic idiots having been chosen as ruler, it is
customary to speak of him as "the choice of the people," whereas it is
obvious that he is one of the few men, seldom exceeding two or three, whom
it is certainly known that nearly one-half the people regard as unfit for
the position. He is less certainly "the people's choice" than any other
man in the country excepting his unsuccessful opponents; for while it is
known that a large body of his countrymen did not want him, it cannot be
known how many of his supporters really preferred some other person, but
had no opportunity to make their preference effective.

The Tamtonians are very proud of their form of government, which gives
them so much power in selecting their rulers. This power consists in the
privilege of choosing between two men whom but a few had a voice in
selecting from among many millions, any one of whom the rest might have
preferred to either. Yet every Tamtonian is as vain of possessing this
incalculably small influence as if he were a Warwick in making kings and a
Bismarck in using them. He gives himself as many airs and graces as would
be appropriate to the display of an honest pin-feather upon the
pope's-nose of a mooley peacock.

Each congenital idiot whom the ax-grinders name for the office of
_Tnediserp_ has upon the "ticket" with him a dead man, who stands or falls
with his leader. There is no way of voting for the idiot without voting
for the corpse also, and _vice versa_. When one of these precious couples
has been chosen the idiot in due time enters upon the duties of his office
and the corpse is put into an ice-chest and carefully preserved from
decay. If the idiot should himself become a corpse he is buried at once
and the other body is then haled out of its ice to take his place. It is
propped up in the seat of authority and duly instated in power. This is
the signal for a general attack upon it. It is subjected to ev