f the mediation of the ladies of Mr.
Lovelace's family, put myself into their protection, unless I am
resolved to give up all hopes of a reconciliation with my own.

Yet if any happy introduction could be thought of to effect this
desirable purpose, how shall terms be proposed to my father, while
this man is with me, or near me? On the other hand, should they in his
absence get me back by force, (and this, you are of opinion, they would
attempt to do, but in fear of him,) how will their severest acts of
compulsion be justified by my flight from them!--Mean while, to what
censures, as you remind me, do I expose myself, while he and I are
together and unmarried!--Yet [can I with patience ask the question?] Is
it in my power?--O my dear Miss Howe! And am I so reduced, as that, to
save the poor remains of my reputation in the world's eye, I must watch
the gracious motion from this man's lips?

Were my cousin Morden in England, all might still perhaps be determined
happily.

If no other mediation than this can be procured to set on foot the
wished-for reconciliation, and if my situation with Mr. Lovelace alter
not in the interim, I must endeavour to keep myself in a state of
independence till he arrive, that I may be at liberty to govern myself
by his advice and direction.

I will acquaint you, as you desire, with all that passes between
Mr. Lovelace and me. Hitherto I have not discovered any thing in his
behaviour that is very exceptionable. Yet I cannot say, that I think
the respect he shews me, an easy, unrestrained, and natural respect,
although I can hardly tell where the fault is.

But he has doubtless an arrogant and encroaching spirit. Nor is he
so polite as his education, and other advantages, might have made one
expect him to be. He seems, in short, to be one, who has always had too
much of his own will to study to accommodate himself to that of others.

As to the placing of some confidence in him, I shall be as ready to take
your advice in this particular, as in all others, and as he will be
to deserve it. But tricked away as I was by him, not only against my
judgment, but my inclination, can he, or any body, expect, that I should
immediately treat him with complaisance, as if I acknowledged obligation
to him for carrying me away?--If I did, must he not either think he a
vile dissembler before he gained that point, or afterwards?

Indeed, indeed, my dear, I could tear my hair, on reconsidering what you
wri