ying. "That young man,"
he said, "is an official."--Yes, sir.--"On his way from St. Petersburg.
And his name," he said, "is Ivan Aleksandrovich Khlestakov, and he's
going," he said "to the government of Saratov," he said. "And he acts
so queerly. It's the second week he's been here and he's never left the
house; and he won't pay a penny, takes everything on account." When
Vlas told me that, a light dawned on me from above, and I said to Piotr
Ivanovich, "Hey!"--

DOBCHINSKY. No, Piotr Ivanovich, I said "HEY!"

BOBCHINSKY. Well first YOU said it, then I did. "Hey!" said both of us,
"And why does he stick here if he's going to Saratov?"--Yes, sir, that's
he, the official.

GOVERNOR. Who? What official?

BOBCHINSKY. Why, the official who you were notified was coming, the
Inspector.

GOVERNOR [terrified]. Great God! What's that you're saying. It can't be
he.

DOBCHINSKY. It is, though. Why, he doesn't pay his bills and he doesn't
leave. Who else can it be? And his postchaise is ordered for Saratov.

BOBCHINSKY. It's he, it's he, it's he--why, he's so alert, he
scrutinized everything. He saw that Dobchinsky and I were eating
salmon--chiefly on account of Dobchinsky's stomach--and he looked at our
plates so hard that I was frightened to death.

GOVERNOR. The Lord have mercy on us sinners! In what room is he staying?

DOBCHINSKY. Room number 5 near the stairway.

BOBCHINSKY. In the same room that the officers quarreled in when they
passed through here last year.

GOVERNOR. How long has he been here?

DOBCHINSKY. Two weeks. He came on St. Vasili's day.

GOVERNOR. Two weeks! [Aside.] Holy Fathers and saints preserve me! In
those two weeks I have flogged the wife of a non-commissioned officer,
the prisoners were not given their rations, the streets are dirty as a
pothouse--a scandal, a disgrace! [Clutches his head with both hands.]

ARTEMY. What do you think, Anton Antonovich, hadn't we better go in
state to the inn?

AMMOS. No, no. First send the chief magistrate, then the clergy, then
the merchants. That's what it says in the book. The Acts of John the
Freemason.

GOVERNOR. No, no, leave it to me. I have been in difficult situations
before now. They have passed off all right, and I was even rewarded
with thanks. Maybe the Lord will help us out this time, too. [Turns to
Bobchinsky.] You say he's a young man?

BOBCHINSKY. Yes, about twenty-three or four at the most.

GOVERNOR. So much the better. It's easi