feeling, foreign to me even naturally. O Lord, mercifully keep Thy
servant from openly dishonouring Thy name! Rather take me soon home
to Thyself!

Jan. 10. Today I went with my family to Trowbridge.

Jan. 12. Trowbridge. This evening I commenced reading Whitfield's
life, written by Mr. Philip.

Jan. 13. I have already received blessings through Whitfield's life.
His great success in preaching the Gospel is evidently to be
ascribed, instrumentally, to his great prayerfulness, and his reading
the Bible on his knees. I have known the importance of this for
years; I have practiced it a little, but far too little. I have had
more communion with God today than I have had, at least generally,
for some time past.

Jan. 14. Lord's day. I have, continued reading Whitfield's life. God
has again blessed it to my soul. I have spent several hours in prayer
today, and read on my knees, and prayed for two hours over Psalm
lxiii. God has blessed my soul much today. I have been fighting
together with the armies of Jesus, though this is the tenth Lord's
day since I have been kept from preaching, and though I have not
assembled with the brethren here, on account of my head. My soul is
now brought into that state, that I delight myself in the will of
God, as it regards my health. Yea, I can now say, from my heart, I
would not have this disease removed till God, through it, has
bestowed the blessing for which it was sent. He has drawn out my soul
much yesterday and today. Lord, continue Thy goodness, and fill me
with love! I long, more fully to glorify God; not so much by outward
activity, as by inward conformity to the image of Jesus. What hinders
God, to make of one, so vile as I am, another Whitfield? Surely, God
could bestow as much grace upon me, as He did upon him. O, my Lord,
draw me closer and closer to Thyself, that I may run after Thee!---I
desire, if God should restore me again for the ministry of the Word
(and this I believe He will do soon, judging from the state in which
He has now brought my soul, though I have been worse in health the
last eight days, than for several weeks previously), that my
preaching may be more than ever the result of earnest prayer and much
meditation, and that I may so walk with God, that "out of my belly
may flow rivers of living water." But alas! if the grace of God
prevent not, one day more, and the rich blessings, which He has
bestowed upon my soul yesterday and today, will all vanish; but
a