for your Whigs--your _retrenching_ old Whigs
Then, shout, &c.

In a word, round the throne we've stuck sisters and wives,
Our brothers and cousins fill bench, church, and steeple;
Assist us to stick in, at least for _our_ lives,
And nicely "we'll sarve out" Queen, Lords, ay, and People.
That's the fun for your Whigs--your bed-chamber old Whigs!
Shout, shout, &c.

What was the reply to this pathetic, this generous appeal? Name it not at
Woburn-abbey--whisper it not at Panshanger--breathe it not in the epicurean
retreat of Brocket-hall! Tears, big tears, roll down our sympathetic checks
as we write it. It was simply--"Cock-a-doodle-do!"

* * * * *

LORD JOHNNY "LICKING THE BIRSE."

Lord John Russell, on his arrival with his bride at Selkirk the other day,
was invested with the burghship of that ancient town. In this ceremony,
"licking the birse," that is, dipping a bunch of shoemaker's bristles in a
glass of wine and drawing them across the mouth, was performed with all due
solemnity by his lordship. The circumstance has given rise to the following
_jeu d'esprit_, which the author, Young Ben D'Israeli, has kindly dropped
into PUNCH'S mouth:--

Lord Johnny, that comical dog,
At trifles in politics whistles;
In London he went _the whole hog_,
At Selkirk he's _going the bristles_.

* * * * *

"Why are Sir Robert Peel and Sir James Graham like two persons with only
one intellect?"--"Because there is an understanding between them."

"Why is Sir Robert Peel like a confounded and detected
malefactor?"--"Because he has nothing at all to say for himself."

* * * * *

A QUERY.

The _Salisbury Herald_ says, that Sir John Pollen stated, in reference to
his defeat at the Andover election, "that from the bribery and corruption
resorted to for that purpose, they (the electors) would have returned a
jackass to parliament." Indeed! How is it that he tried and failed?

* * * * *

LORD HOWICK, it is said, has gone abroad for the benefit of his health; he
feels that he has not been properly treated at home.

* * * * *

NURSERY EDUCATION REPORT.

As much anxiety necessarily exists for the future well-being of our beloved
infant Princess, we have determined to take upon ourselves the onerous
duti