course you know we wouldn't accept a thing like
that in Peoria, where I come from, as a gift! No, indeed! If the King of
Italy sent it over to our Mayor, he'd return it C.O.D.

JINNY. Sounds like Boston and the Macmonnies Bacchante!

MRS. CULLINGHAM. Oh, my dear, _worse_ than that! It reminds me of a man
at home who kept an underclothing store in our principal street and had
a plaster cast of this gent's brother, I should think, in his window to
show a suit of Jaegers on,--you know, a "combination"! And our Town
Committee of Thirteen for the moral improvement of Peoria made the man
take it out of his window and hang the suit up empty!

JINNY. Poor man!

MRS. CULLINGHAM. You ought to see our Park!--you know we've got a
perfectly beautiful park,--and all the _men_ statues wear Prince
Alberts, and stand like this-- [_She poses with lifted arm at right
angle to body._] --as if they were saying, "This way out" or "To the
monkey cage and zoo."

JINNY. [_Laughing._] But the women statues?

MRS. CULLINGHAM. My dear! They only have heads and hands; all the rest's
just clumps of drapery--we only have "Americans" and "Libertys," anyway.
They apply the Chinese emigration law to all Venuses and _sich ladies_!

[_They both laugh._

JINNY. Where did you say Peter and Ruth were?

MRS. CULLINGHAM. Well, I left Peter--who isn't at all well; I hoped this
trip would help his indigestion, but it seems to have made it worse!--I
left him--er--in a room with a lot of _broken-up Venuses_--I thought it
was all right; he was eating candy, and there wasn't a whole woman among
'em!

JINNY. [_Slight strain in her voice._] How did you happen to bring over
Ruth Chester?

MRS. CULLINGHAM. Well, you know I always liked her. She never snubbed me
in her life--I don't think any one you've introduced me to has been
quite so nice to Peter and me as Mrs. Chester and her daughter.

JINNY. O they _are_ real people!

MRS. CULLINGHAM. Ruth is terribly depressed over something. She's thin
as a rail and the family are worried. She says there's nothing worrying
her, and the doctors can't find anything the matter with her,--so Mrs.
Chester asked me if I wouldn't take her abroad. They thought the voyage
and change might do her good, and I seem to have a more cheery influence
over her than most people. So here we are! [_As PETER enters Left,
eating._] Here's Peter! How do you think the darling looks?

PETER. How do you do, Mrs. Austin?

JINNY. How