carcely a thing
in the house that's not either shaky, or shabby, or both!

[_Breaks down._

_Edwin_ (_entering with a flushed face, and clenched fists_). ANGY,
my darling, _don't_ waste your tears over that vile combination of
unseasoned timber and devil's-dust. Rather pluck up a spirit and
pitch into _me_, who was fool enough to be tricked by a plausible
advertisement, a scheming vendor of shoddy furniture, a hired villa,
a verbose villain, and the thrice-told tale of a mythical "Indian
gentleman," an imaginary "emergency," and a purely supposititious
"sacrifice." [_Left lamenting._

* * * * *

"A DANIEL!"

[Illustration: G.O.M. DANIEL in the Irish Lions' Den.]

Years ago, when BRITON RIVIERE painted his picture of "_Daniel in the
Lions' Den_," which foppishly-speaking men would speak of as "_Deniel
in the Lions' Dan_," public curiosity was aroused by the fact that
DANIEL was facing the lions with his back to the spectators. Of
course, in this instance, the public mind is not exercised by the
problem which was put to the Showman by an inquiring small boy, in the
memorable formula of inquiry, "Please, Sir, which is DANIEL, and which
is the Lions?" as never, for one moment, could there have existed, in
the densest brain, the smallest doubt as to the identity of the Hebrew
Seer. Should the question now be put by an intending purchaser, Mr.
WILLIAM AGNEW has only to give an adaptation of the historic reply,
and say, "Whichever you like, my little dear; _if_ you pay your money,
you may take your choice."

Now in this grand picture there is no sort of doubt, "no possible
doubt whatever," as to which is DANIEL and which are the Lions; but
there must arise in the spectator's mind the question, _Who was the
painter's model for this figure of_ DANIEL? To this there can be but
one answer, "the G.O.M." This is the painter's model for DANIEL. Here
he stands looking up towards the opening and seeing daylight. His
hands are tied by the bonds of a majority against him. As for the
Lions they may be Irish Lions, who may be thinking of another grand
old DAN, The Liberator, but who, once upon a time, in the good old
Kilmainham Gaol days, would have fallen upon this G.O.M. and torn him
in pieces; not so now. It is a grand picture.

* * * * *

"WHO'S YOUR HATTER?" OR, SIDE-LIGHTS ON ECCLESIASTICAL HISTORY.--Years
ago, the great Ritual Case was that of Mr. BENNETT,