ed
scrubbings, following by perfume, toilet water and talcum powder. So
when "Jazz" was really discovered, he smelt, but more like a barber shop
than a goat. The ship's officers appreciated the joke and so did
everyone else and soon "Jazz" became a favorite on deck. Repeatedly
shampooed and perfumed, wearing a life-preserver, he moved about like a
good sailor. But there was less joyful days ahead of him.

He did not exactly set foot on English soil as did his friends. He went
ashore at an unmentionable port in a kit bag. In this he lay with the
other bags, surrounded by a screen of men. "Jazz" was uncomfortable and
said so in his goat way, but before he had uttered a full syllable his
friends set up a cheer which drowned his voice.

This happened again and again. The first time, British transport
officers at the port politely disregarded the Americans' demonstrations,
but after the third time one of them exclaimed:

"Extraordinary, these Americans. Wonderful spirit."

And a little later when the men burst into an excessively loud hurrah to
annihilate the voice of "Jazz" an elderly British colonel came over to
them and inquired of a young American officer nearby:

"Splendid lungs your chaps have! But, really, what are they cheering for
now?"

"Oh," returned the American, who very well knew why, "they're like that.
Always cheering about something. Shall I stop it?"

"No, indeed! I think it's splendid."

So that adventure passed over nicely and "Jazz" went on in a "goods van"
with the kit bags to another British sea port. After that there wasn't
any further trouble.

----
WHERE LANGUAGE FAILS.
----

Remember along about examination time how you used to think Hades would
be a good place for the professor?

Two Williams College graduates have had the pleasure of meeting their
old French teacher in the nearest earthly approach to the Inferno--the
trenches.

Officers now, the ex-students finally readied the battalion commander's
post in a certain sector after a two-mile trudge from the rear through
mud and ice water up to their hips.

A French interpreter met them at the door of the post.

"Yes, the major is in," he said, "but he won't see you till you shake
hands with _me_."

Both officers thought they were face to face with a nut. Then, as they
recognized their old teacher, two hands shot and grasped both of his.