sitting on the
soldier's neck, and were it not for his seizing me by the feet, I should
fall, and perhaps kill myself.

Then the corporal and another soldier take hold of me by the arms and
legs, and throw me over the man's head, so that I may see there is
nothing dreadful about it, as though I did not jump right over him
because I was afraid, while it is that my arms are so weak, I cannot
lean upon them and raise myself into the air.

But when I say so, they only laugh, and don't believe me. They say, "It
won't help you; you will have to serve anyhow!"

* * * * *

When, on the other hand, it comes to "theory," the corporal is very
pleased with me.

He says that except himself no one knows "theory" as I do.

He never questions me now, only when one of the others doesn't know
something, he turns to me:

"Well, Blumin, _you_ tell me!"

I stand up without hurrying, and am about to answer, but he is
apparently not pleased with my way of rising from my seat, and orders me
to sit down again.

"When your superior speaks to you," says he, "you ought to jump up as
though the seat were hot," and he looks at me angrily, as much as to
say, "You may know theory, but you'll please to know your manners as
well, and treat me with proper respect."

"Stand up again and answer!"

I start up as though I felt a prick from a needle, and answer the
question as he likes it done: smartly, all in one breath, and word for
word according to the book.

He, meanwhile, looks at the primer, to make sure I am not leaving
anything out, but as he reads very slowly, he cannot catch me up, and
when I have got to the end, he is still following with his finger and
reading. And when he has finished, he gives me a pleased look, and says
enthusiastically "Right!" and tells me to sit down again.

"Theory," he says, "that you _do_ know!"

Well, begging his pardon, it isn't much to know. And yet there are
soldiers who are four years over it, and don't know it then. For
instance, take my comrade Ossadtchok; he says that, when it comes to
"theory", he would rather go and hang or drown himself. He says, he
would rather have to carry three pails of water than sit down to
"theory."

I tell him, that if he would learn to read, he could study the whole
thing by himself in a week; but he won't listen.

"Nobody," he says, "will ever ask _my_ advice."

One thing always alarmed me very much: However was I to take part in