l, with my eyes shut, and the
fellow stroked my face a bit. I waited to see if anything would come
of it--and nothing did, that's all. At least, I'm not aware that I did
anything peculiar. In fact, I'm _certain_ I didn't. (_Uneasily._) Eh,
ANGELINA?

_Ang._ (_indistinctly, owing to her face being buried in cushions_).
If you d-d-d-on't really know, you'd bub-bub-better-not ask--but I
believe you do--quite well!

_Ed._ Look here, ANGIE, if I behaved at all out of the common, it's
just as well that I should know it. I don't recollect it, that's all.
Do pull yourself together, and tell me all about it.

_Ang._ (_sitting up_). Very well--if you will have it, you must. But
you can't really have forgotten how you stood before the footlights,
making the most horrible faces, as if you were in front of a
looking-glass. All those other creatures were doing it, too; but, oh,
EDWIN, yours were far the ugliest--they haunt me still.... I mustn't
think of them--I won't! [_Buries her face again._

_Ed._ (_reddening painfully_). No, I say--_did_ I? not really--without
humbug, ANGELINA!

_Ang._ _You_ know best if it was without humbug! And, after that, he
gave you a glass of cuc-cod-liver oil, and--and pup-pup-paraffin,
and you dud-drank it up, and asked for more, and said it was the
bub-bub-best Scotch whiskey you ever tasted. You oughtn't even to
_know_ about Scotch whiskey!

_Ed._ I can't know much if I did _that_. Odd I shouldn't remember it,
though. Was that all?

_Ang._ Oh, no. After that you sang--a dreadful song--and pretended to
accompany yourself on a broom. EDWIN, you know you did; you can't deny
it!

_Ed._ I--I didn't know I _could_ sing; and--did you say on a broom?
It's bad enough for me already, ANGELINA, without _howling_! Well, I
sang--and what then?

_Ang._ Then he put out a cane with a silver top close to your face,
and you squinted at it, and followed it about everywhere with your
nose; you _must_ have known how utterly idiotic you looked!

_Ed._ (_dropping into a chair_). Not at the time.... Well, go on,
ANGELINA; let's have it all. What next?

_Ang._ Next? Oh, next he told you you were the Champion Acrobat of
the World, and you began to strike foolish attitudes, and turn great
clumsy somersaults all over the stage, and you always came down on the
flat of your back!

_Ed._ I _thought_ I felt a trifle stiff. Somersaults, eh? Anything
else? (_With forced calm._)

_Ang._ I did think I should have _die