Bite. He allowed the Proprietor to talk himself out,
and then he walked up and down the Counters, careless-like, to see what
was on the Shelves, and he did some quiet Figuring in a Memorandum Book
such as they give away at Drug Stores. Before he left he had Traded 20
Acres of flinty Hillside in New Hampshire for the Clothing Store, the
Mortgage on the Land to be Assumed by the New Owner, and he had $75 to
Boot and an Agreement in Writing.

[Illustration: THE TRAPPER]

The Hauler-In is now Clerking and trying to Hold Out enough to give him
another Start.

MORAL: _Lower Broadway is not New England_.

_THE_ FABLE _OF THE_ INVETERATE JOKER WHO REMAINED _IN_ MONTANA

The Subject of this Fable started out in Life as a Town Cut-Up. He had a
keen Appreciation of Fun, and was always playing Jokes. If he wanted a
few Gum-Drops he would go into the Candy Store and get them, and then
ask the Man if he was willing to take Stamps. If the Man said he was,
then the Boy would stamp a couple of times, which meant that the Laugh
was on the Man. It was considered a Great Sell in Those Parts.

Or else he would go into a Grocery with another tricky Tad and get some
Article of Value, and they would pretend to Quarrel as to which should
Pay for it. One would ask the Proprietor if he cared who paid for it,
and if he said he did not, they would up and tell him to Pay for it
Himself. This one was so Cute that they had a little Piece in the Paper
about it.

Or they would go and Purchase a Watermelon to be paid for as soon as a
Bet was decided, and afterward it would Develop that the Bet was whether
the Saw-Mill would fall to the East or the West, in case the Wind blew
it over.

It was Common Talk that the Boy was Sharp as a Tack and Keen as a Brier
and a Natural-Born Humorist.

Once he sold a Calf to the Butcher, several Hours after the Calf had
been struck by Lightning. As for ordering Goods and having them charged
to his Father, that was one of the Slickest Things he ever did.

About the time the Joker was old enough to leave Home, he traveled out
through the Country selling Bulgarian Oats to the Farmers. When the
Contract for the Seed Oats got around to the Bank, it proved to be an
iron-clad and double-riveted Promissory Note. The Farmer always tried to
get out of Paying it, but when the Case came to Trial and the Jurors
heard how the Agent palavered the Hay-Seed they had to Snicker right out
in Court. They always gave Judg