ly at his ease, he said, "The
fact was, they had been dining at a tavern, and were rather
drunk, and on their way through the Piazza, they endeavoured
by running away to give the slip to their three companions,
who were still worse than themselves. The others, however
called out Stop thief! and the watchman stopped them;
whereat they naturally felt irritated, and certainly gave
the watchman a bit of a thrashing."

Mr. Birnie.--"How was he to know you were not the thieves?
He did quite right to stop you, and I am very glad he has
brought you here--Pray, Sir, what are you?" Defendant.--"I
am nothing, Sir." Mr. Birnie (to another).--"And what are
you?" Defendant.--"Why, Sir, I am--I am, Sir, nothing." Mr.
Birnie.--"Well, this is very fine. Pray, Sir, (turning to
the third, who stood twirling his hat) will you do me the
favour to tell what you are?"

This gentleman answered in the same way. "I am, as my
friends observed, nothing."

Mr. Birnie.--"Well, gentlemen, I must endeavour to make
something of you. Here, gaoler, let them he locked up, and I
shall not part with them until I have some better account of
their occupations."

We have heard it asserted, that Nine tailors make a man. How
many Dandies, professing to be Nothing, may be required to
accomplish the proposed intention of making Something, may
(perhaps by this time) be discovered by the worthy
Magistrate. We however suspect he has had severe work of it.

~74~~"Leave me alone," exclaimed the almost petrified Dandy.

"Not till you have given me the satisfaction I have a right to demand,"
cried Tom. "I insist upon an explanation and apology--or demand your
card--who are you, Sir? That's my address," instantly handing him a
card. "I am not to be played with, nor will I suffer your escape, after
the insulting manner in which you have spoken, with impunity."

Though not prepared for such a rencontre, the Dandy, who now perceived
the inflexible temper of Tom's mind--and a crowd of people gathering
round him--determined at least to put on as much of the character of a
man as possible, and fumbled in his pocket for a card; at length finding
one, he slipped it into Tom's hand. "Oh, Sir," said he, "if that's the
case, I'm your man, _demmee_,--how, when, or where you please, 'pon
honor." Then beckoning to a hackney coach, he hobbled to th