I had lately been told that
_idiots_ always failed in calculation, I considered myself but a few
removes from idiocy. My answering that advertisement was a proof of it;
and here I was, hundreds of miles from any familiar sight, going to
teach pupils who probably knew more than I did! I had my music and
French, to be sure, and that was _some_ foundation--but not half so
solid as a substantial base of figures.

In a sort of frantic desperation, I began, to ply myself with impossible
sums in mental arithmetic, until I nearly got a brain fever; and the
cars stopped, and the dreaded station was shouted in my ears, while I
was in the midst of a desperate encounter with a group of stubborn
fractions.

How I dreaded the sight of the personage who had twice subscribed
himself my 'obedient servant, Elihu Summers'! My 'obedient servant,'
indeed! More likely my inexorable taskmaster, with figures in his eye
and compound fractions at his tongue's end. I painted his portrait:
tall, wiry, with compressed lips, and a general air of seeing through
one at a glance. Now, when one is painfully conscious of being deficient
in several important points, this sort of person is particularly
exasperating; and I immediately began to hate Mr. Summers with all my
might.

Nevertheless, I shook considerably, and, having been informed that I
would be met at the station, though by whom or what was not specified, I
prepared to alight, with my bag and shawl and 'Harper,' attached to
various parts of my person. Considering how short the step is from the
sublime to the ridiculous, the length, or rather height, of that step
from the car to the platform was out of all proportion; I looked upon it
as an invention of the enemy, and stood hopelessly considering the
impossibility of a descent without the aid of a pair of wings.

Raising my eyes in dismay, I saw in the dim light a pair of arms
outstretched to my assistance; and, observing that the shoulders
pertaining thereto were broad and solid-looking, I deposited my hundred
and twenty pounds of flesh and bone thereon without any compunctions of
conscience, and no questions asked. I almost fell in love with that
individual for the very tender manner in which I was lifted to the
ground; but, once safe on terra firma, I merely said, 'Thank you, sir,'
and was gliding rapidly into the ladies' saloon, half afraid of
encountering Mr. Summers in my journey.

But my _aide-de-camp_, with a hasty stride, arrested