PLATFORMULARS.

"_If at any time, by one jot, or one tittle, or one hair's breadth, or
in the very slightest degree, or in the least_;" _i.e._, "What, oh, what
was I going to say? Can't go on like this for ever."

"_Never was the country menaced with a more critical danger; never was
our Party more enthusiastically united in confronting it_;" _i.e._, "It
won't make a bad cry, and may pull the stragglers together a bit."

"_An oration which for a splendid combination of close reasoning and
moving eloquence, is scarcely paralleled even among the many
masterpieces of the illustrious speaker_;" _i.e._, "An average speech
from the point of view of the speaker's journalistic supporters."

"_Its loose logic, ineffective rhetoric, and undignified petulance,
furnishes a pitiful proof of the intellectual and moral decadence of a
once great name_;" _i.e._, The same oration seen from the other side.

FRIENDLY COMMENTS ON CHARACTER AND ACCOMPLISHMENTS.

"_His knowledge of music is something quite phenomenal_;" _i.e._, "He
knows, and can talk about, absolutely nothing else."

"_Would be quite lovely, but for a certain_ je ne sais quoi _which
repels most people_;" _i.e._, "Beautiful beyond all criticism that is
not vaguely venomous."

"_You dear thing_!" _i.e._, "You inconsequent little noodle!"

CURIOMANIA.

"_How quite too weirdly quaint!_" _i.e._, "What an uncanny horror of
archaic ugliness!"

"_How quite too awfully kind of you to take all this trouble!_" _i.e._,
"Foolish old faddist! What is bliss to him is boredom to me."

"_How fearful you must be of fire!_" _i.e._, "Oh, for a lucky
conflagration!"

RAILROAD AMENITIES.

"_Oh, I'm sure I shall enjoy it immensely_;" _i.e._, "He can't talk any
more than a semaphore, and looks as sleepy as an owl."

"_What! You go right on to-day without changing? That is nice;_" _i.e._,
"Confound it! I thought there would be a chance of a cigar after the
Junction."

"_Oh yes, plenty of room, and pleased to have you_;" _i.e._, "Old
nuisance! will quite spoil my promising _tete-a-tete_."

PREPARING FOR PRIVATE THEATRICALS.

"_You see you have just the figure--slim and graceful you know--for
Signor Dumcramboni, which is the great thing_;" _i.e._, "Must flatter
him a little, or he'll kick at the one-speech part."

"_Oh, I leave myself entirely in your hands_;" _i.e._, "Wait till I'm
fairly in, and _I_'ll show him!"

"_Really, the prodigious passion that Mr. Elderberrie thr