the Tems Embankment, opened on
Toosday, and I'm told as about a thowsend pupils went a scrambling in
there, as hurly as 9 a clock, with their shiny morning faces, and with
their scratchels on their backs, as the Poet says, and with their
lunches in 'em, as praps the Poet didn't kno of; and arterwards, the
LORD MARE and his Sherryffs went to Epping Forest and dined at a Pick
Nick with a lot of Werderers, whatever they may be, and some common
Counselmen, but, strange to say, they didn't have no Wenson! so they
made Game of one another. They didn't arsk that Mr. PERCY LINDLEY, who's
allers a finding fault with 'em for cutting so many trees down and then
cutting 'em up. They ort to have known from their long xperience, that a
jolly good dinner woud most likely have made him hopen his mouth, and
shut his eyes, and hold his Tung, like a gennelman."

"At a meeting at 'Good Old Bethnal Green,' as a werry lowd woiced
gennelman called it, it was enounced that Mr. PASSMORE EDWARDS, the
howner of the howdacious hapenny 'Hecko,' had promised to give 'em
L20,000 to bild 'em a new Library with! when the lowd woiced gennelman
ginerously enounced that he woud buy a coppy of that paper the werry
next day! If that isn't grattetude, what is?"

* * * * *

A Cambridge Mathematician of repute has just concluded a careful and
exhaustive calculation, by which he maintains that if all the pork-chops
eaten in London in a week were placed in a row, they would reach from
Camberwell to the Isle of Wight; and if piled in a heap on each other,
would form a mound half as high again as Primrose Hill.

[Illustration]

NOTICE.--Rejected Communications or Contributions, whether MS., Printed
Matter, Drawings, or Pictures of any description, will in no case be
returned, not even when accompanied by a Stamped and Addressed Envelope,
Cover, or Wrapper. To this rule there will be no exception.

* * * * *

End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume
98, May 17, 1890., by Various

*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK PUNCH, CHARIVARI, MAY 17, 1890 ***

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