n--the face that charms us.
If scoop or scuttle, spoon or spade,
No matter; each of them alarms us.

* * * * *

A POSSIBLE BUNGLER.--Through REUTER'S Agency last Friday, we learn that
"BUNGLE KHAN is in Afghan territory." Capital man to be opposed to us. We
shall be ready to take any advantage of him, as, if BUNGLE KHAN _can
bungle_, he will of course do so.

* * * * *

ONE FOR THE OTHER SIDE.--Mrs. R. cannot understand how Mr. GLADSTONE can
advocate Monometallism in the House of Commons, as, she says, she has
always heard that "Words are silver, and silence is gold."

* * * * *

[Illustration: EMBARRASSING.

_Curate._ "HELLO, REGIE! AH, IT'S GOOD TO BE YOU! A POOR BEGGAR LIKE ME,
YOU SEE, HAS TO BE CONTENT WITH RUNNING AFTER THE HOUNDS ON FOOT."

_Regie_ (_who, as the Son of our M.F.H., has all the Hunting-Man's horror
of Foot-people_). "AH--YES. AND THE PATER SAYS HE WOULDN'T MIND THAT SO
MUCH, IF ONLY HALF THE PARISH DIDN'T SOMETIMES TURNOUT TO RUN AFTER
_YOU_!"]

* * * * *

ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.

EXTRACTED FROM THE DIARY OF TOBY, M.P.

_House of Commons, Monday, February 27._--"Am thinking, TOBY," said RIGBY,
just now, "of applying for Chiltern Hundreds. Parliament isn't quite the
place I pictured to myself when I fought for a seat. Of course I've done
pretty well. To be made SOLICITOR-GENERAL right off, with WADDY around, and
WILLIS still in prime of life and energy, was a fine thing. But House seems
perversely inclined to accept me as a joke, and that's not the sort of
thing I'm accustomed to at Chancery Bar. Look what happened the other
night, when, in my learned brother RUSSELL'S absence, I answered questions.
Did it in my best, most imposing, and conclusive style. Kept my eye on
SPEAKER throughout, to see how he'd take it. Effect most satisfactory. You
know I make CHITTY sit up, and NORTH tremble. They, to certain extent, used
to it; all new to SPEAKER, and told accordingly. Was really fascinated
myself. I frowned at him, pursed my mouth, wrinkled my forehead, squared my
jaw, sometimes lowered my voice into my boots, anon uplifted it above where
my wig ought to have been. Being my first appearance at table, thought it
worth while to make an effort. Judging from SPEAKER'S limp appearance
towards conclusion of my remarks, felt I had done it. Suddenly curious
noise, that