do you think about it?

_She_. I don't know the place--isn't it somewhere in America?

_He_. I shouldn't be surprised if it were, but my geography's shaky. I
rather fancy it's somehow connected with pickles.

_She_. Oh, then it's a mistake their quarrelling, as I suppose it will
be hard upon the poor, especially during the winter?

_He_. Fancy that's the idea. Been to the Guelph Exhibition?

_She_. Yes, and I think it's a pity they took the jewels out of GEORGE
THE FOURTH's Crown. I should like to have seen the Koh-i-Noor.

_He_. But they wanted them for the one at the Tower, don't you know,
and as for the Koh-i-Noor, was _that_ invented in his time?

_She_. Perhaps it wasn't. Stay, wasn't it discovered by Captain COOK,
or DRAKE, or somebody?

_He_. I daresay. I have never looked the matter up. _A propos_,
One-pound Bank-notes are to be issued.

_She_. Are they? I suppose they will be useful for change?

_He_. Shouldn't be astonished, but don't pretend to know anything
about it. By the way, do you take much interest in the subjects we
have been discussing?

_She_. Not the faintest.

_He_. No more do I! [_Waltz continued._

* * * * *

DEARNESS AND DEARTH.

"Spanish onions are rising in price, though probably only
temporarily."--_Daily News_.

I.

Will it be long, then--long?
For the people watch and wait,
Till the strength of the onion makes them strong,
At only the normal rate.
And their eyes are dim with tears,
And ache with the need of sleep.
And watch till the lapse of the lapsing years
Shall make the onions cheap.
Cheap, my love, cheap! Sleep, my love, sleep!
Onions are dear, love, but sentiment's cheap!

II.

Listen! Is it a voice
Calling--again--again,
Or a fragrance to make my heart rejoice
From the sunlit land of Spain?
Listen, my own, my bride,
While the glad tears dew your cheek,
They are fried, my bride, by the sad sea tide
With a smell that can almost speak
Creep, my love, creep into the deep,
And sing to the fishes that onions are cheap.

* * * * *

THE PROPOSED ONE-POUND NOTES.--"Ne-Goschenable currency."

* * * * *

AN ELEGY ON A MAD DOG.

(_AFTER GOLDSMITH, MORE OR LESS._)

Good patriots all of every sort,
Give ear unto my song,
For if in substance it is short,
In moral