re not willing to alarm
the citizens by recalling to their memory, at an improper time, this
instance of their former partiality.

I apprehended that I should meet with difficulties, on account of having
changed my religion, but none occurred; the laws of Geneva being less
harsh in that particular than those of Berne, where, whoever changes his
religion, not only loses his freedom, but his property. My rights,
however, were not disputed: but I found my patrimony, I know not how,
reduced to very little, and though it was known almost to a certainty
that my brother was dead, yet, as there was no legal proof, I could not
lay claim to his share, which I left without regret to my father, who
enjoyed it as long as he lived. No sooner were the necessary formalities
adjusted, and I had received my money, some of which I expended in books,
than I flew with the remainder to Madam de Warrens; my heart beat with
joy during the journey, and the moment in which I gave the money into her
hands, was to me a thousand times more delightful than that which gave it
into mine. She received this with a simplicity common to great souls,
who, doing similar actions without effort, see them without admiration;
indeed it was almost all expended for my use, for it would have been
employed in the same manner had it come from any other quarter.

My health was not yet re-established; I decayed visibly, was pale as
death, and reduced to an absolute skeleton; the beating of my arteries
was extreme, my palpitations were frequent: I was sensible of a continual
oppression, and my weakness became at length so great, that I could
scarcely move or step without danger of suffocation, stoop without
vertigoes, or lift even the smallest weight, which reduced me to the most
tormenting inaction for a man so naturally stirring as myself. It is
certain my disorder was in a great measure hypochondriacal. The vapors
is a malady common to people in fortunate situations: the tears I
frequently shed, without reason; the lively alarms I felt on the falling
of a leaf, or the fluttering of a bird; inequality of humor in the calm
of a most pleasing life; lassitude which made me weary even of happiness,
and carried sensibility to extravagance, were an instance of this. We
are so little formed for felicity, that when the soul and body do not
suffer together, they must necessarily endure separate inconveniences,
the good state of the one being almost always injurious to t