w Courts and ask
one of the attendants where that is, he will say, rather pityingly, "Do
you mean the _Bear-Garden_?" and you will know at once that you have
lost caste. Caste is a thing you should be very careful of in these
days, so the best thing is to ask for the Bear-Garden straightaway.

It is in the purlieus of the Law Courts and very hard to find. It is up
a lot of very dingy back-staircases and down a lot of very dingy
passages. The Law Courts are like all our public buildings. The parts
where the public is allowed to go are fairly respectable, if not
beautiful, but the purlieus and the basements and the upper floors are
scenes of unimaginable dinginess and decay. The Law Courts' purlieus are
worse than the Houses of Parliament's purlieus, and it seems to me that
even more disgraceful things are done in them. It only shows you the
danger of Nationalisation.

On the way to the Bear-Garden you pass the King's Remembrancer's This is
the man who reminds HIS MAJESTY about people's birthdays; and in a large
family like that he must be kept busy. Not far from the King's
Remembrancer there is a Commissioner for Oaths; you can go into his room
and have a really good swear for about half-a-crown. This is cheaper
than having it in the street--that is, if you are a gentleman; for by
the Profane Oaths Act, 1745, swearing and cursing are punishable by a
fine of one shilling for every day-labourer, soldier or seaman; two
shillings for every other person under the degree of a gentleman; and
five shillings for every person of or above the degree of a gentleman.
This is not generally known. The Commissioner of Oaths is a very
broad-minded man, and there is literally no limit to what you may swear
before him. The only thing is that he insists on your filing it before
you actually say it. This may cause delay; so that if you are feeling
particularly strongly about anything it is probably better to have it
out in the street and risk being taken for a gentleman.

There are a number of other interesting functionaries on the way to the
Bear-Garden; but we must get on. When you have wandered about in the
purlieus for a long time you will hear a tremendous noise, a sort of
combined snarling and roaring and legal conversation. When you hear
that, you will know that you are very near the bears. They are all
snarling and roaring in a large preliminary arena, where the bears
prepare themselves for the struggle; all round it are smaller ca