uld not hope to prosecute my reforms
until I should regain my liberty and re-establish myself in my old
world. I therefore quitted the role of reformer-militant; and, but for
an occasional outburst of righteous indignation at some flagrant abuse
which obtruded itself upon my notice, my demeanor was that of one quite
content with his lot in life.

I was indeed content--I was happy. Knowing that I should soon regain my
freedom, I found it easy to forgive--taking great pains not to
forget--any injustice which had been done me. Liberty is sweet, even to
one whose appreciation of it has never been augmented by its temporary
loss. The pleasurable emotions which my impending liberation aroused
within me served to soften my speech and render me more tractable. This
change the assistant physician was not slow to note, though he was
rather slow in placing in me the degree of confidence which I felt I
deserved. So justifiable, however, was his suspicion that even at the
time I forgave him for it. I had on so many prior occasions "played
possum" that the doctor naturally attributed complex and unfathomable
motives to my most innocent acts. For a long time he seemed to think
that I was trying to capture his confidence, win the privilege of an
unlimited parole, and so effect my escape. Doubtless he had not
forgotten the several plans for escape which I had dallied with and
bragged about while in the violent ward.

Though I was granted considerable liberty during the months of April,
May, and June, 1903, not until July did I enjoy a so-called unlimited
parole which enabled me to walk about the neighboring city unattended.
My privileges were granted so gradually that these first tastes of
regained freedom, though delightful, were not so thrilling as one might
imagine. I took everything as a matter of course, and, except when I
deliberately analyzed my feelings, was scarcely conscious of my former
deprivations.

This power to forget the past--or recall it only at will--has
contributed much to my happiness. Some of those who have suffered
experiences such as mine are prone to brood upon them, and I cannot but
attribute my happy immunity from unpleasant memories to the fact that I
have viewed my own case much as a physician might view that of a
patient. My past is a thing apart. I can examine this or that phase of
it in the clarifying and comforting light of reason, under a memory
rendered somewhat microscopic. And I am further compens