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Mister JACKSON's travelling hexpenses!!! Oh, I say! Pugs _is_ a-looking up! And yet I'm told some o' your cockered-up fly-flappers carnt 'it a 'ole in a pound o' butter, or stand a straight nose-ender without turning faint! Evidently funking _and_ faking pays a jolly sight better than 'onesty and 'ard 'itting. Well, well, _Mister Punch_, I'm hout of it now, thanksbe. And I ain't sure as I could shape myself 'andy to the Slugger SULLIVAN and JEM SMITH kind o' caper. The "resources o' science" is so remarkable different from what they wos in _my_ days, and include so many new-fangled barnies as we worn't hup to. These 'ere pugilistic horchids, so to speak, wants deliket 'andling _in_ the Ring, as well as hout on it, and a fair 'ammering from a 'onest bunch o' fives might spile the pooty look of 'em for their fust-clarss Saloons, Privet Boxes, and Swell Clubs. But you can tell Mister JACKSON, Eskvire, an cetrer, an cetrer, an cetrer (put it all in, please, Sir, as I vant to be perlite), that in my day I'd a bin only too 'appy to fight 'im to a finish (which mighn't ha' bin in five minutes, either, hunless he wanted it so), for--his Travelling Hexpenses!!! Yours to kommand, THE CHICKEN. * * * * * SINGULAR PLURALITY! O SHAW-LEFEVRE, was it but fatality, Or could it be because the subjects bore 'em, That, when you wished to argue on plurality. About one Member came to form a quorum? No doubt the others meant this to denote That when you speak you like "One Man, One Vote." * * * * * FRIENDLY ADVICE TO MRS. HUMPHRY WARD, A PROPOS OF HER TROUBLE WITH HER ADVERSE CRITICS.--_Grieve_ no more! * * * * * [Illustration: WHAT OUR ARTIST (THE ONE WHO PAINTS THE PRETTY "KISS-MAMMY" PICTURES) HAS TO PUT UP WITH. _Tommy._ "IT'S A LITTLE GIRL, FAST ASLEEP, WITH HER DOLL IN HER ARMS!" _Jimmy._ "YES; AND WHEN SHE WAKES UP, _WON'T_ SHE BE FRIGHTENED AT THAT GREAT BIG BIRD!"] * * * * * ST. JOHN'S WOOD. These hapless homes of middle class, Can they escape annihilation When come, in place of trees and grass, A filthy goods-yard and a station? If such seclusion sheltered Peers, Their wealth and influence might save it; No speculator ever fears Artists or writers such as crave it; Or if it housed the WORKING MAN, Would Lords or Com
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