old, they would have done
so with fear. The Squire shook him heartily by the hand, and
congratulated him on his safe arrival at Headlong Hall. The Doctor
returned the squeeze, and assured him that the congratulation was by
no means misapplied.

Next came the three philosophers, highly delighted with their walk,
and full of rapturous exclamations on the sublime beauties of the
scenery.

The Doctor shrugged up his shoulders, and confessed he preferred the
scenery of Putney and Kew, where a man could go comfortably to sleep
in his chaise, without being in momentary terror of being hurled
headlong down a precipice.

Mr Milestone observed, that there were great capabilities in the
scenery, but it wanted shaving and polishing. If he could but have it
under his care for a single twelvemonth, he assured them no one would
be able to know it again.

Mr Jenkison thought the scenery was just what it ought to be, and
required no alteration.

Mr Foster thought it could be improved, but doubted if that effect
would be produced by the system of Mr Milestone.

Mr Escot did not think that any human being could improve it, but had
no doubt of its having changed very considerably for the worse, since
the days when the now barren rocks were covered with the immense
forest of Snowdon, which must have contained a very fine race of wild
men, not less than ten feet high.

The next arrival was that of Mr Cranium, and his lovely daughter Miss
Cephalis Cranium, who flew to the arms of her dear friend Caprioletta,
with all that warmth of friendship which young ladies usually assume
towards each other in the presence of young gentlemen.[3.2]

Miss Cephalis blushed like a carnation at the sight of Mr Escot, and
Mr Escot glowed like a corn-poppy at the sight of Miss Cephalis. It
was at least obvious to all observers, that he could imagine the
possibility of one change for the better, even in this terrestrial
theatre of universal deterioration.

Mr Cranium's eyes wandered from Mr Escot to his daughter, and from his
daughter to Mr Escot; and his complexion, in the course of the
scrutiny, underwent several variations, from the dark red of the peony
to the deep blue of the convolvulus.

Mr Escot had formerly been the received lover of Miss Cephalis, till
he incurred the indignation of her father by laughing at a very
profound craniological dissertation which the old gentleman delivered;
nor had Mr Escot yet discovered the means of mollifying