An old lady in Bangor, Maine, sends the following entertaining anecdote
of one of our most distinguished fellow-citizens:--

The late Senator R-----, who, by the way, was a very portly man, was in
the habit of riding over the fields to consult Judge B-----, his wife's
cousin, on points of extra-judicial import. One morning, just as he was
about to get down from his horse.--(NOTE BY ED.--The middle of this
anecdote is so long, so dull, and has so little connection with either
the head or the tail, that it is necessarily omitted.)

"Well," said the Judge, "what would you do then?"

"_I don't know_," said the Senator. "Do you?"

If our public men were, at all times, as thoughtful as these two, the
country would be better for it.

NECESSARY NOTE.--Persons sending anecdotes to this Drawer (or those
reading them), need not expect to make anything by the operation.

* * * * *

PRUSSIAN PRACTICE AND PROFESSION.

KING WILLIAM of Prussia thinks he has a mission to perform, and goes on
his present raid in France as a missionary. To an unprejudiced sceptic,
however, needle-guns, rifle-cannons, requisitions on the country,
devastations of crops, bombarding of cities, and the rest of the
accompaniments of his progress are, if possible, even worse in their
effects upon the unhappy people subjected to his missionary efforts than
the New England rum which accompanied the real missionaries in their
descent upon the now depopulated islands of the Pacific. Private people
with missions are nuisances, but public people with such ideas are
simply unbearable.

In the case of kings, if we may trust the democratic movement which this
war in Europe is aiding so greatly, the only mission the people will
soon allow to kings is dis-mission.

* * * * *

Prussian Cruelty.

"A PASS for THIERS," the telegrams state, has been promised by the King
of Prussia. There is a sound of mockery in this. Prussia's obstinacy in
pushing the war has made so many widows and orphans that all France is a
PASS for TEARS.

* * * * *

[Illustration: FRIGHTFUL SHOCK SUSTAINED BY BEAU BIGSBY ON BEING
SUDDENLY BROUGHT FACE TO FACE WITH ONE OF THOSE DISTORTING MIRRORS.]

* * * * *

OUR PORTFOLIO.

"Up in a balloon, boys!"--_Macbeth_.

TOURS, FIFTH WEEK Of THE REPUBLIC, 1870.

DEAR PUNCHINELLO: To all men of lofty ambition I w