ad, the outlook for the
ministerial profession is far from encouraging. To tell us that these
men spent their lives "in uplifting their fallen brethren" is imposing
upon the good nature of one's audience. It is simply one more evidence
added to the long list already noted that one does not readily acquire
the habit of expecting to read the truth in a patent medicine
advertisement. Rather the reverse. We examine them in expectant
curiosity to note their unique and devilish ability to tell picturesque
falsehoods.

Certain famous pills are advertised extensively in Great Britain and in
the United States. It is claimed by the manufacturers that they are
"composed entirely of medicinal herbs" and that they will "cure"
constipation, pains in the back, cold chills, bad legs, maladies of
indiscretion, kidney and urinary disorders--and several other things.

These pills were analyzed by the British Medical Association's chemists,
who reported that they consisted of ginger, soap, and aloes. Where the
"medicinal herbs" were it was hard to say.

In large and lurid letters we are informed in the advertisements that
these pills are "worth a guinea ($5.00) a box." The retail price is 27
cents a box. The British Medical Association's chemist states that the
cost of these pills is one-quarter of a cent per box. Quite a fair
margin of profit considering the high cost of living these days!

CHAPTER XXXII

THE PATENT MEDICINE EVIL--Continued

Patent Medicine Firms and Quacks Dispose of the Confidential
Letters Sent to Them--Patent Medicine Concerns and Letter
Brokers--The Patent Medicine Conspiracy Against the Freedom of
the Press--How The Patent Medicine Trust Crushes Honest Effort.

HOW QUACKS DISPOSE OF THE CONFIDENTIAL LETTERS SENT TO THEM

When you write for information--which is usually the first step--in
reply to an advertisement of this character, you receive in reply a
letter, which addresses you in an intimate way, as, "Dear or Esteemed
Friend." It informs you that "we are devoting our lives in the interest
of suffering humanity," and requests you to waste no time in writing a
full account of your symptoms and sickness; that such information will
be sacredly regarded as confidential and filed away from the prying eyes
of everyone except the "doctor" who reads it.

Every art is used to give the writer the impression that she is doing
business with responsible and reputable people; that what sh