ses wherein the 'drawing-room book' reposed always in the same
sacred corner. Yet in the matter of derelict articles we are
millionaires, we are beset by squatters."

I could see that Ursula was impressed, though she tried to conceal
the fact. "Professional literary men seem to be strangely under the
dominion of one word," she began coldly.

At that moment a bell tinkled.

"Eliza!" cried Ursula; "and I'm not dressed." As she fluttered from
the room I had a distinct impression that she was not sorry for an
excuse to break off the interview.

I re-settled myself at my desk, smiling a little cynically. How
long would the lesson last? Then I happened to glance towards the
mantelpiece, beside which Ursula had been standing. There, hastily
propped against the clock, was that detestable photograph. It still
quivered in the movement of release, as though shaking its shoulders,
settling down palpably for another decade. With an uncontrollable
impulse I leapt up, seized the abomination and, flinging it on the
floor, ground it to powder with my heel.

In one word, the anti-squatting campaign had definitely begun.

A. E.

* * * * *

[Illustration: _Navvy._ "WHY DON'T YER WEAR THEM BOARDS THE RIGHT WAY
ROUND?"

_Sandwichman._ "WOT! IN ME DINNER-HOUR? NOT ME!"]

* * * * *

"Some five or six million years hence, therefore, it is
prophesied, the earth will fall into the grip of an ice age. There
will descend on all living things the blight of eternal cod."

_Scotch Paper._

Although the danger is not immediate it deserves the serious
consideration of the FOOD CONTROLLER.

* * * * *

=SQUISH.=

_(Being some notes on a bye-path in politics.)_

The Board of Agriculture has been biding its time. In the fierce light
of publicity which has been beating of late upon Mr. LLOYD GEORGE,
Mr. WINSTON CHURCHILL and Sir ERIC GEDDES the attempt of this rustic
Ministry to assert itself has passed almost unnoticed. Our gaze has
been fixed upon the London railway termini, upon Warsaw and upon
Belfast; we have been neglecting Campden (Glos.). Yet in that town, I
read, "the Ministry of Agriculture has completed arrangements for a
commercial course in the State Fruit and Vegetable College to instruct
students in the manufacture of preserved fruit products."

I have considered the last part of the sentence quoted above ver