d to camp next week.
Will you join us? Sylvan scenery; country air; simple wholesome diet; young
and cheery society. Cigars or cocoanuts every time you hit the bull's-eye.
Practice at stray dogs about camp is encouraged. Secure the skin of one of
these beautifully-marked creatures for your own barrack-room bedside.

(5) _Hair, Length of._--The practice of allowing the hair to grow beyond
the regulation length must cease.

Why suffer the inconvenience of long hair when our own regimental tonsorial
artist is waiting to bob it for you free of charge? Luxurious saloon; deft
workmanship; no tips. His speciality--memento locks. Twelve such souvenirs
guaranteed from one crop. Bald soldiers supplied to taste from surplus
clippings. A delicate, lasting and inexpensive compliment to lady friends
on leaving a station. Start collecting now.

* * * * *

INNS OF COURT RESERVE CORPS.

A psychical seance of the above disembodied Corps will be held on Friday
the 26th March, in the Common Room of the Law Society in Chancery Lane (by
kind permission of the Council), commencing 7.30 P.M.

Astral members desirous of attending should apply to their late Platoon
Sergeants, or to Mr. H.L. BOLTON, 1, The Sanctuary, Westminster.

* * * * *

[Illustration: THE RETURN OF THE EX-CHAMPION.

MR. LLOYD GEORGE. "WELCOME BACK! I'VE BEEN WANTING A SPARRING PARTNER TO
GET ME INTO CONDITION; AND YOU'RE THE VERY MAN."]

* * * * *

ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.

_Monday, February 23rd._--The Highland Fling involves, I understand, some
complicated figures, but it is nothing to the Lowland Reel (COATS'
variety), on which subject Sir AUCKLAND GEDDES was rather badly heckled
this afternoon. A suggestion that Messrs. COATS might use the profits of
their foreign trade to reduce the price to the home consumer drove the
harassed Minister into an unconscious _mot_. "Suppose," he said, "they cut
the thread ... where should we be then?"

[Illustration: THE TANK AND THE LITTLE BRICK.

(MR. CHURCHILL AND CAPTAIN WEDGWOOD BENN.)

"The tank, weighing thirty tons, is able to pass over a brick lying on the
road without crushing it. This is a very important point."--_Mr.
CHURCHILL_.]

Mr. CHARLES PALMER, the well-known _Globe_-trotter, has just completed a
remarkable journey. Within the space of a few weeks he has traversed the
distance from the Press Gallery to the Floor