ng judges, they would certainly
award it to the English, because they were then sure to live
undisturbed, and quiet under you.
_Beam._ Very good; proceed, sir.
_Fisc._ 'Tis true, you gave us aid in our time of need, but you paid
yourselves with our cautionary towns: And, that you have since
delivered them up, we can never give sufficient commendation, either
to your honesty, or to your wit; for both which qualities you have
purchased such an immortal fame, that all nations are instructed how
to deal with you another time.
_Beam._ A most grateful acknowledgment; sweet sir, go on.
_Fisc._ For your trade abroad, if you should obtain it, you are so
horribly expensive, that you would undo yourselves and all
Christendom; for you would sink under your very profit, and the gains
of the universal world would beggar you: You devour a voyage to the
Indies, by the multitude of mouths with which you man your vessels:
Providence has contrived it well, that the Indies are managed by us,
an industrious and frugal people, who distribute its merchandise to
the rest of Europe, and suffer it not to be consumed in England, that
the other members might be starved, while you of Great Britain, as you
call it, like a rickety head, would only swell and grow bigger by it.
_Jul._ I have heard enough of England; have you nothing to return upon
the Netherlands?
_Beam._ Faith, very little to any purpose; he has been beforehand with
us, as his countrymen are in their trade, and taken up so many vices
for the use of England, that he has left almost none for the Low
Countries.
_Jul._ Come, a word, however.
_Beam._ In the first place, you shewed your ambition when you began to
be a state: For not being gentlemen, you have stolen the arms of the
best families of Europe; and wanting a name, you made bold with the
first of the divine attributes, and called yourselves the High and
Mighty: though, let me tell you, that, besides the blasphemy, the
title is ridiculous; for High is no more proper for the Netherlands,
than Mighty is for seven little rascally provinces, no bigger in all
than a shire in England. For my main theme, your ingratitude, you have
in part acknowledged it, by your laughing at our easy delivery of your
cautionary towns: The best is, we are used by you as well as your own
princes of the house of Orange: We and they have set you up, and you
undermine their power, and circumvent our trade.
_Fisc._ And good reason, if our i
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