in the days when I had friends, used to shorten this to
Mina. Be my friend so far, and call me Mina, too.
After these few words of introduction, will your patience bear with me,
if I try to make you better acquainted with my uncle and aunt, and if I
allude to circumstances connected with my new life which had, as I fear,
some influence in altering my character for the worse?
II.
WHEN I think of the good General's fatherly kindness to me, I really
despair of writing about him in terms that do justice to his nature. To
own the truth, the tears get into my eyes, and the lines mingle in such
confusion that I cannot read them myself. As for my relations with my
aunt, I only tell the truth when I say that she performed her duties
toward me without the slightest pretension, and in the most charming
manner.
At nearly fifty years old, Lady Claudia was still admired, though she
had lost the one attraction which distinguished her before my time--the
attraction of a perfectly beautiful figure. With fine hair and
expressive eyes, she was otherwise a plain woman. Her unassuming
cleverness and her fascinating manners were the qualities no doubt
which made her popular everywhere. We never quarreled. Not because I was
always amiable, but because my aunt would not allow it. She managed me,
as she managed her husband, with perfect tact. With certain occasional
checks, she absolutely governed the General. There were eccentricities
in his character which made him a man easily ruled by a clever woman.
Deferring to his opinion, so far as appearances went, Lady Claudia
generally contrived to get her own way in the end. Except when he was
at his Club, happy in his gossip, his good dinners, and his whist, my
excellent uncle lived under a despotism, in the happy delusion that he
was master in his own house.
Prosperous and pleasant as it appeared on the surface, my life had its
sad side for a young woman.
In the commonplace routine of our existence, as wealthy people in
the upper rank, there was nothing to ripen the growth of any better
capacities which may have been in my nature. Heartily as I loved and
admired my uncle, he was neither of an age nor of a character to be the
chosen depositary of my most secret thoughts, the friend of my inmost
heart who could show me how to make the best and the most of my life.
With friends and admirers in plenty, I had found no one who could hold
this position toward me. In the midst of society I wa
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