t in the position of St. Anthony surrounded by
swarms of cute and playful little movie-girls.

Or take the Rev. James Roscoe Day, D.D., S.T.D., LL.D., D.C.L.,
L.H.D., a leading light of the Methodist Episcopal Church, who offers
himself as comic relief in our Clerical Vaudeville. Dr. Day is
Chancellor of Syracuse University, a branch of the Mental Munitions
Department of the Standard Oil Company; his function being to
manufacture intellectual weapons and explosives to be used in defense
of the Rockefeller fortune. It is generally not expected that the
makers of ruling-class munitions should face the dirty and perilous
work of the trenches; but ten years ago, during a raid by an active
squad of muckrake-men, Chancellor Day astonished the world by rushing
to the front with both arms full of star-shells and bombs. He
afterwards put the history of this gallant action into a volume, "The
Raid on Prosperity"; and if you want the real thrill of the class-war,
here is where to get it!

The Chancellor is a quaint and touching figure; an enthusiast and
dreamer, idealist and martyr, in whom the ordinary human virtues have
been fused, absorbed, transformed and sublimated into a new supreme
virtue of loyalty to Exploitation, patriotism for Profiteering. He
began life as a working-man, he tells us, in the good old American
fashion of hustle for yourself; but he differed from other Americans
in that he had an instant, intuitive recognition of the intellectual
and moral excellence of Plutocracy. The first time he met a rich man,
he quivered with rapture, he burst into a hymn of appreciation. So
very quickly he was recognized as a proper person to have charge of a
Mental Munition Works; and the ruling classes proceeded to pin medals
upon the bosom of his academic robes--D.D., S.T.D., L.L.D., D.C.L.,
L.H.D.

The Chancellor knows the masters of our Profit System, those
"consummate geniuses of manufacture and trade by which the earth has
yielded up her infinite treasures." And having been at the same time
in intimate daily communion with the Almighty, he can tell us the
Almighty's attitude towards these prodigies. "God has made the rich of
this world to serve Him.... He has shown them a way to have this
world's goods and to be rich towards God....God wants the rich men....
Christ's doctrines have made the world rich, and provide adequate uses
for its riches." Also the Chancellor knows our great corporations, and
gives us the Almighty's