bygones," interrupted _Mr. Punch_. "GEORGE RANGER is
no longer your landlord, except, in a certain sense, representing the
interests of the Regular Army, and I shall keep _my_ eye upon him in
that capacity."

"An entirely satisfactory arrangement. But where are the fancy tents,
and the luncheon parties, and all the etceteras that used to be so
pleasant at Wimbledon?"

"Disappeared," returned _Mr. Punch_, firmly. "Bisley is to be more
like Shoeburyness (where the Artillery set an excellent example to
the Infantry) than the Surrey saturnalia."

"And is it to be _all_ work and no play?"

"That will be the general idea. Of course, in the evening, when
nothing better can be done, there will be harmonic meetings round the
camp-fires. But while light lasts, the crack of the rifle and the
ping of the bullet will be heard in all directions, _vice_ the pop
of champagne corks superseded. And if you don't like the prospect,
my dear RIP, you had better go to sleep again."

But Private VAN WINKLE remained awake--to his best interests!

* * * * *

ROBERT ON MATRIMONY.

Well, we're jest about going it, at the reel "Grand Hotel," we are. We
had jest about the werry lovliest wedding here, larst week, as I ewer
seed, ewen with my great xperiense. Such a collekshun of brave-looking
men and reel handsum women as seldom meets together xcept on these
most hintresting occashuns. And as good luck wood have it, jest as
we was in the werry wirl and xcitement of it all, who should come in
to lunch but the same emminent yung Swell as cum about a munth ago.
And he had jest the same helegant but simple lunch as before, with a
bottle of the same splendid Champane, as before, and he didn't harf
finish it, as before, and not a drop of what he left was wasted, as
before; and so, when he paid me his little account, he arsked me if
many of the werry bewtifool ladies, as I had told him of when he came
larst, had been to the "Grand" lately, so the bold thort seized, me,
and I says to him, "Yes, your ---- ----, there's jest a nice few of
'em here now, and if you will kindly foller me up to our bewtifool
Libery, and will keep your eyes quite wide open as you gos along, you
will see jest about a hole room full of 'em."

[Illustration]

So I took him parst the grand room in which the Wedding Gests was
assembled, and there sure enuff, he seed such a collection of smiling
bewty, as ewidently made a great impression on h