d the dark monsters that lay in wait for me. They would draw
me to them, and clutch me tightly and bear me away by land and sea,
through dark realms that no soul has seen. I feel myself on board,
drawn through waters, hovering in clouds, sinking--sinking.

I give a hoarse cry of terror, clutch the bed tightly--I had made such
a perilous journey, whizzing down through space like a bolt. Oh, did I
not feel that I was saved as I struck my hands against the wooden
frame! "This is the way one dies!" said I to myself. "Now you will
die!" and I lay for a while and thought over that I was to die.

Then I start up in bed and ask severely, "If I found the word, am I not
absolutely within my right to decide myself what it is to signify?"...
I could hear myself that I was raving. I could hear it now whilst I was
talking. My madness was a delirium of weakness and prostration, but I
was not out of my senses. All at once the thought darted through my
brain that I was insane. Seized with terror, I spring out of bed again,
I stagger to the door, which I try to open, fling myself against it a
couple of times to burst it, strike my head against the wall, bewail
loudly, bite my fingers, cry and curse....

All was quiet; only my own voice echoed from the walls. I had fallen to
the floor, incapable of stumbling about the cell any longer.

Lying there I catch a glimpse, high up, straight before my eyes, of a
greyish square in the wall, a suggestion of white, a presage--it must
be of daylight. I felt it must be daylight, felt it through every pore
in my body. Oh, did I not draw a breath of delighted relief! I flung
myself flat on the floor and cried for very joy over this blessed
glimpse of light, sobbed for very gratitude, blew a kiss to the window,
and conducted myself like a maniac. And at this moment I was perfectly
conscious of what I was doing. All my dejection had vanished; all
despair and pain had ceased, and I had at this moment, at least as far
as my thought reached, not a wish unfilled. I sat up on the floor,
folded my hands, and waited patiently for the dawn.

What a night this had been!

That they had not heard any noise! I thought with astonishment. But
then I was in the reserved section, high above all the prisoners. A
homeless Cabinet Minister, if I might say so.

Still in the best of humours, with eyes turned towards the lighter,
ever lighter square in the wall, I amused myself acting Cabinet
Minister; called myself Von