cation. She went to
work in her father's store, an' the whole gang o' Lizzie-chasers
had to change their gait again. She organized our prosperous young
ladies' club--a model of its kind--the purpose of which is the
promotion of simple livin' an' a taste for useful work. They have
fairs in the churches, an' I distribute a hundred dollars in cash
prizes--five dollars each for the best exhibits o' pumpkin-pie,
chicken-pie, bread, rolls, coffee, roast turkey, plain an' fancy
sewin', an' so on. One by one the girls are takin' hold with us
an' lettin' go o' the grand life. They've begun to take hold o'
the broom an' the dish-cloth, an' the boys seem to be takin' hold
o' them with more vigor an' determination. The boys are concluding
that it's cheaper to buy a piano-player than to marry one, that
canned prima-donnas are better than the home-grown article, that
women are more to be desired than playthings.

IV

IN WHICH THE HAM WAR HAS ITS BEGINNING

"One day in the old time a couple of industrious Yankees were hard
at work in a field," Socrates continued. "Suddenly one said to the
other:

"'I wish I was worth ten thousand dollars.'

"An' the other asked:

"'What would ye do with it?'

"The wisher rested on his shovel an' gave his friend a look of
utter contempt.

"'What would I do with it?' he said. 'Why, you cussed fool, I'd
set down--an' without blamin' myself.'

"By-and-by the Yankee got to settin' down without blamin' himself,
an' also without the ten thousand. Here in Pointview we're
learnin' how to stand up again, an' Lizzie is responsible. You
shall hear how it happened.

"First I must tell you that Dan had been makin' little progress in
the wooin' o' Lizzie. Now she was inclined to go slow. Lizzie was
fond o' Dan. She put on her best clothes when he came to see her
of a Sunday. She sang to him, she walked him about the place with
her arm in his, but she tenderly refused to agree to marry him.
When he grew sentimental she took him out among the cucumbers in
the garden. She permitted no sudden rise in his temperature.

"'I will not marry,' she said, 'until I have done what I can to
repay my father for all that he has tried to do for me. I must be
uneducated and re-educated. It may take a long time. Meanwhile
you may meet some one you like better. I'm not going to pledge you
to wait for me. Of course I shall be awfully proud and pleased if
you do wait, but, Dan, I want you to be