nhanced by
the contributions of others--by dear grandpapa's autograph on the
fly-leaf, for example. But it annoys me to be blamed for other folks'
opinions.

The other day a visitor called and discoursed with me during the greater
part of a wet afternoon. He had come for an interview--'dreadful trade,'
as Edgar said of samphire-gathering--and I wondered, as he took his
departure, what on earth he would find to write about: for I love to smoke
and listen to other men's opinions, and can boast with Montaigne that
during these invasive times my door has stood open to all comers. He was
a good fellow, too; having brains and using them: and I made him an
admirable listener.

It amused me, some while after, to read the interview and learn that _I_
had done the talking and uttered a number of trenchant sayings upon female
novelists. But the amusement changed to dismay when the ladies began to
retort. For No. 1 started with an airy restatement of what I had never
said, and No. 2 (who had missed to read the interview) misinterpreted No.
1.'s paraphrase; and by these and other processes within a week my
digestive silence had passed through a dozen removes, and was incurring
the just execration of a whole sex. I began to see that my old college
motto--_Quod taciturn velis nemini dixeris_--which had always seemed to me
to err, if at all, on the side of excess, fell short of adequacy to these
strenuous times.

I have not kept the letters; but a friend of mine, Mr. Algernon Dexter,
has summarised a very similar experience and cast it into chapters, which
he allows me to print here. He heads them--

HUNTING THE DRAG.

CHAPTER I.

_Scene: The chastely-furnished writing-room of Mr. Algernon Dexter, a
well-known male novelist. Bust of Pallas over practicable door L.U.E.
Books adorn the walls, interspersed with portraits of female relatives.
Mr. Dexter discovered with Interviewer. Mr. D., poker in hand, is bending
over the fire, above which runs the legend, carved in Roman letters across
the mantelpiece, 'Ne fodias ignem gladio._'

INTERVIEWER (_pulling out his watch_): "Dear me! Only five minutes to
catch my train! And I had several other questions to ask.
I suppose, now, it's too late to discuss the Higher Education of Women?"

Mr. D. (_smiling_): "Well, I think there's hardly time. It will take you
a good four minutes to get to the station."

INTERVIEWER: "And I must get my typew