e--The
Discovery--The Capture--Safe--The Press--Mystery--Evasive--Experts--I
Retaliate--The _Westminster Gazette_--The Schoolboy--The
Scare--Sensation--Death--Matters Zoological--Modern Inconveniences--Do
Women Fail in Art?--Wanted a Wife _pp._ 190-234

CHAPTER XIII.

THE CONFESSIONS OF A DINER.

My FirstCity Dinner--A Minnow against the Stream--Those Table Plans--Chaos
--The City Alderman, Past and Present--Whistler's Lollipops--Odd
Volumes--Exchanging Names--Ye Red Lyon Clubbe--The Pointed
Beard--Baltimore Oysters--The Sound Money Dinner--To Meet General
Boulanger--A Lunch at Washington--No Speeches.

THE THIRTEEN CLUB--What it was--How it was Boomed--Gruesome
Details--Squint-Eyed Waiters--Superstitious Absentees--My Reasons for
being Present--'Arry of _Punch_--The Lost "Vocal" Chords--The
Undergraduate and the Undertaker--Model Speeches--Albert Smith--An
Atlantic Contradiction--The White Horse--The White Feather--Exit 13
_pp._ 235-271

CHAPTER XIV.

THE CONFESSIONS OF AN EDITOR.

Editors--Publishers--An Offer--Why I Refused it--The _Pall Mall Budget_
--_Lika Joko_--The _New Budget_--The Truth about my Enterprises--
_Au Revoir!_ _pp._ 272-280

[Illustration: HARRY FURNISS'S (EGYPTIAN STYLE). _From "Punch."_]

LIST OF ILLUSTRATIONS.

PAGE

An Artistic Joke. A London Slum. My Parody of the
Venetian School. _Frontispiece._

My Studio during the Progress of "An Artistic Joke" 1

Harry Furniss's Royal Academy 3

Throwing myself into it 5

Fire! 6

The Pictures by R. Macbeth:
Potato Gang in the Fens;
Twitch-burning in the Fens;
A Flood in the Fens 8

Macbeth in the Fens 9

Letter from the President of the Royal Academy 11

"An Artistic Joke" 15

Mr. Sambourne's Prospectus 18

Cover of "How he did it"