, or
your companionship will become tiresome to the best of listeners.

"Drawing Out Others."

The very essence of the art of conversation is to draw others out and
cause them to shine; to be more anxious, apparently, to discover other
people's opinions than to advance your own.

Who does not remember gratefully and admiringly the sympathetic people
who seem to draw out the very best there is in us--in whose company we
appear almost brilliant, and actually surprise ourselves by the
fluency and point of our remarks? Such people are a boon to society.
No one sits dull and silent in their presence, or says unpleasant,
sarcastic things before them, and, while never seeming to advance any
views of their own, and certainly never forcing them upon our
attention, we involuntarily learn of them and love them, scarcely
knowing why.

Malebranche showed his knowledge of human nature when he wrote: "He
who has imparted to others his knowledge without any one perceiving it
and without drawing from it any advantage, necessarily gains all
hearts by his virtuous liberality. Those who would be loved, and who
have much wit, should thus impart it to others."

The Passion for Argument.

Never permit yourself to be drawn into an argument in general society.
Nothing can be more provocative of anger on one side or another, or
more destructive to conversation, than a lengthy and, too often,
bitter argument. Good breeding would suggest that the subject be
changed at once before the controversy becomes heated. Especially
should any debate upon politics or religion be avoided as subjects
upon which two seldom agree, but which are so close to the hearts of
the majority as to cause serious annoyance if their pet beliefs are
touched upon or questioned. Be careful, also, not to take the opposite
side of _every_ question that is brought up in conversation.

Wit and Humor.

Sidney Smith once said: "Man could direct his ways by plain reason and
support his life on tasteless food, but God has given us wit and
flavor, and laughter and perfumes, to enliven the days of man's
pilgrimage, and to charm his pained footsteps over the burning marl."
And Sidney Smith was so much the life and soul of every social
gathering that, while the English language is spoken, his witty
remarks will be quoted with delight.

Wit, however, is too often but another name for sarcasm and ridicule,
that, like a barbed arrow, rankles long in the soul of its victim.