the parcel we took from the
linen-closet this morning?

MADAME VAGRET. What parcel?

CATIALENA. The parcel--you know, Madame--when we were arranging the
things in the linen-closet.

MADAME VAGRET [_suddenly_] Oh--yes, yes. Take it to my room.

CATIALENA. Where shall I put it there?

MADAME VAGRET. Oh well, put it down here. I will put it away myself.

CATIALENA. Very good, Madame. [_She leaves the room_]

MADAME VAGRET [_snipping at the parcel and speaking to herself_] It's no
use stuffing it with moth-balls--it'll all be moth-eaten before ever you
wear it.

VAGRET. What is it?

MADAME VAGRET [_placing the parcel on the table and opening the
wrapper_] Look!

VAGRET. Ah, yes--my red robe--the one you bought for me--in advance--two
years ago.

MADAME VAGRET. Yes. That time it was Gamard who was appointed instead of
you.

VAGRET. What could you expect? Gamard had a deputy for his
brother-in-law; there's no getting over that. The Ministry has to assure
itself of a majority.

MADAME VAGRET. And to think that in spite of all my searching I haven't
been able to discover so much as a municipal councillor among our
relations!

VAGRET. Well--hide this thing. It torments me. [_He returns the gown,
which he had unfolded, to his wife_] In any case I dare say it wouldn't
fit me now.

MADAME VAGRET. Oh, they fit anybody, these things!

VAGRET. Let's see--[_He takes off his coat_]

MADAME VAGRET. And it means a thousand francs more a year!

VAGRET. It isn't faded. [_At this moment Bertha enters. Vagret hides the
red gown_] What is it?

BERTHA. It's only me.

VAGRET. You startled me.

BERTHA [_catching sight of the gown_] You've been appointed! You've been
appointed!

VAGRET. Do be quiet! Turn the key in the door!

BERTHA. Papa has been appointed!

MADAME VAGRET. Do as you're told! No, he hasn't been appointed.

VAGRET. It's really as good as new. [_He slips it on_]

MADAME VAGRET. Well, I should hope so! I took care to get the very best
silk.

VAGRET. Ah, if I could only wear this on my back when I'm demanding the
conviction of the Irissary murderer! Say what you like, the man who
devised this costume was no fool! It's this sort of thing that impresses
the jury. And the prisoner too! I've seen him unable to tear his eyes
from the gown of the State Attorney! And you feel a stronger man when
you wear it. It gives one a better presence, and one's gestures are more
dignified: "Gentlemen of the court,