m,
though they are setting traps for them all day long. But the Fairy with
the birch-rod will catch them all in time, and make them begin at one
corner of their shops, and eat their way out at the other: by which time
they will have got such stomach-aches as will cure them of poisoning
little children.

Next he saw all the little people in the world, writing all the little
books in the world, about all the other little people in the world;
probably because they had no great people to write about: and if the
names of the books were not Squeeky, nor the Pump-lighter, nor the
Narrow Narrow World, nor the Hills of the Chattermuch, nor the
Children's Twaddeday, why then they were something else. And all the
rest of the little people in the world read the books, and thought
themselves each as good as the President; and perhaps they were right,
for every one knows his own business best. But Tom thought he would
sooner have a jolly good fairy tale, about Jack the Giant-killer or
Beauty and the Beast, which taught him something that he didn't know
already.

And next he came to the centre of Creation (the hub, they call it
there), which lies in latitude 42.21 deg. south, and longitude 108.56
deg. east.

And there he found all the wise people instructing mankind in the
science of spirit-rapping, while their house was burning over their
heads: and when Tom told them of the fire, they held an indignation
meeting forthwith, and unanimously determined to hang Tom's dog for
coming into their country with gunpowder in his mouth. Tom couldn't help
saying that though they did fancy they had carried all the wit away with
them out of Lincolnshire two hundred years ago, yet if they had had one
such Lincolnshire nobleman among them as good old Lord Yarborough, he
would have called for the fire-engines before he hanged other people's
dogs. But it was of no use, and the dog was hanged: and Tom couldn't
even have his carcase; for they had abolished the have-his-carcase act
in that country, for fear lest when rogues fell out, honest men should
come by their own. And so they would have succeeded perfectly, as they
always do, only that (as they also always do) they failed in one little
particular, viz. that the dog would not die, being a water-dog, but bit
their fingers so abominably that they were forced to let him go, and Tom
likewise, as British subjects. Whereon they recommenced rapping for the
spirits of their fathers; and very much astoni