ly catches cold in the head. Douglas Jerrold
remarked to Brown, "Have you heard the rumor that's flying about
town?"--"No."--"Well, they say that Jones _pays the dog-tax for you_."

MDCXXXVII.--A PUN WITH AN IRISH ACCENT.

HOOD described a good church minister as "Piety _parsonified_."

MDCXXXVIII.--A NEW WAY WITH ATTORNEYS.

ONE day a simple farmer, who had just buried a rich relation, an
attorney, was complaining of the great expense of a funeral cavalcade
in the country. "Why, do you _bury_ your attorneys here?" asked Foote.
"Yes, to be sure we do: how else?"--"O, we never do that in
London."--"No?" said the other, much surprised; "how do you manage,
then?"--"Why, when the patient happens to die, we lay him out in a room
over night by himself, lock the door, throw open the window, and in the
morning he is gone."--"Indeed!" exclaimed the farmer, with amazement;
"what becomes of him?"--"Why, that we cannot exactly tell; all we know
is, there's _a strong smell of brimstone in the room the next morning_."

MDCXXXIX.--THE DOUBT EXPLAINED.

A MAN with a very short nose was continually ridiculing another, whose
nose was remarkably long. The latter said to him one day, "You are
always making observations upon _my nose_; perhaps you think it was made
at the _expense_ of yours."

MDCXL.--A YOKSHIRE BULL.

A YORKSHIRE clergyman, preaching for the Blind Asylum, began by gravely
remarking: "If all the world were blind, what a melancholy _sight_ it
would be!"

MDCXLI.--A ONE-SIDED JOKE.

A LADY requested her husband's permission to wear _rouge_. "I can give
you permission, my dear," he replied, "only for _one_ cheek."

MDCXLII.--TWO CURES FOR AGUE.

BISHOP BLOMFIELD, when presiding over the diocese of London, had
occasion to call the attention of the Essex incumbents to the necessity
of residing in their parishes; and he reminded them that curates were,
after all, of the same flesh and blood as rectors, and that the
residence which was possible for the one, could not be quite impossible
for the other. "Besides," added he, "there are two well-known
preservatives against ague; the one is, a _good deal of care_ and a
_little port wine_; the other, a _little care_ and a _good deal of port
wine_. I prefer the former; but if any of the clergy prefer the
_latter_, it is at all events a remedy which _incumbents_ can afford
better than _curates_."

MDCXLI