infelicities and
vexations which so often attend a journey seem to call out all the
latent selfishness of one's nature; and the commonest observances of
politeness are, we are sorry to say, sometimes neglected. In the
scramble for tickets, for seats, for state-rooms, or for places at a
public table, good manners are too frequently elbowed aside and
trampled under foot. Even our national deference for women is
occasionally lost sight of in our headlong rush for the railway cars
or the steamer.
To avoid the scramble we have alluded to, purchase tickets and secure
state-rooms in advance, if practicable, especially if you are
accompanied by ladies, and, in any event, _be in good time_.
In the cars or stage-coach never allow considerations of personal
comfort or convenience to cause you to disregard for a moment the
rights of your fellow-travelers, or forget the respectful courtesy
due to woman. The pleasantest or most comfortable seats belong to the
ladies, and no gentleman will refuse to resign such seats to them with
a cheerful politeness. In a stage-coach you give them the back seat,
unless they prefer another and take an outside seat yourself, if their
convenience requires it. But a word to--_Americans_ will be enough on
this point.
And what do good manners require of the ladies? That which is but a
little thing to the bestower, but of priceless value to the
receiver--_thanks_--a smile--a grateful look at least. Is this too
much?
Mr. Arbiter, whom we find quoted in a newspaper, has some rather
severe strictures on the conduct of American ladies. He says:
"We boast of our politeness as a nation, and point out to foreigners,
with pride, the alacrity with which Americans make way for women in
all public places. Some love to call this chivalry. It is certainly an
amiable trait of character, though frequently carried to an absurd
extent. But what the men possess in this form of politeness the women
appear to have lost. They never think of acknowledging, in any way,
the kindness of the gentleman who gives up his seat, but settle
themselves triumphantly in their new places, as if they were entitled
to them by divine right."
We are compelled to admit that there is at least an appearance of
truth in this charge. We have had constant opportunities to observe
the behavior of ladies in omnibuses and on board the crowded
ferry-boats which ply between some of our large cities and their
suburbs. We have, of course (as
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